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Pachyderms, Anyone?   General: Non-horse

Started 10/22/11 by LyndaP31; 1312242 views.
gerchgo

From: gerchgo

Feb-10

Hi Chrys, how are you doing? I’m still thinking and praying for you. Many hugs to you , my friend, we’re still here for if you need us. (((Chrys)))

JungleHeart

From: JungleHeart

Feb-10

Struggling.   I have not gotten resolution from social security, VA and now i get an email from someone at the regional bank to JOHN asking JOHN to call him.

I provided the death certificate to the local branch over a month ago.  I called back and got a voicemail.

Things like this happen EVERY DAY.  I am worn out - and it just intensifies my grief.

Thanks for checking on me.  I'm never going to be okay - at my age with this terrible loss, that's a certainty.

 

gerchgo

From: gerchgo

Feb-10

Handling after deaths issues is frustrating, anxious and exhausting! I had to handle everything for my mother, paying back nursing home after sale of her house, physician phone calls for money as well as Medicare issues, so I feel your pain handling government agencies.:( Take a deep breath before answering/ returning phone calls, do only one a day of this type. You may reach out to a local veteran’s agency to help with the VA or your local Washington rep’s office? Perhaps someone reading this here may know how to move things along?

JungleHeart

From: JungleHeart

Feb-11

Thanks.  I've managed to get everything rolling, but it took a lot of work and a lot of tears - frustration and the grief of having to talk about my loss.

I've been working on it since John passed, six weeks ago.  I finally got everything the VA needed.  Now I have to deal with an EIGHT MONTH backlog!  Waiting...

Still waiting on a document social security needs, and that one took a serious amount of research and time.  MANY phone calls - and wading through prompts and being on hold for hours - several times.  Caused me a lot of stress - still is until I get the document in the mail.  Waiting...   and no idea how the widow's pension will turn out.  It won't be as much as I thought it would be, I am sure of that.  Complicated.

Banks, credit card, DMV, mortgage company, insurance - on and on.  The first month of the project was the worst with my grief so deep and raw.

But I've done it - all by myself!  I'm sure I've left things out.  When they come to me, I'll handle them just like the rest of this ordeal.

And now I have to get ready to move and sell the house.  More complications.

This is just the most difficult, painful thing anyone can go through - esp alone and with no family or anyone to help.  Mega anxiety - coupled with intense grief.

I am learning to trust in the Lord.

Thank you so much for your compassion.  I loved my beautiful husband so much.

 

 

gerchgo

From: gerchgo

Feb-11

You have done an awesome job of dealing with all the red tape and such!!! You have also discovered how very strong and assertive you can be with your courage to get everything done, John is proud of you, we are proud of you! Hang in there sweetie, ask for help when you need it-that is always the hard part.  Stay strong, but cry when you need to as that helps relieve some stress. More hugs coming your way,!

Lina_TX

From: Lina_TX

Feb-12

If your "local" SS office is sufficiently "local" that you can go there in person, you might want to consider making an appointment and actually going there with all your paperwork. It's a lot easier to deal with a person-to-person meeting than battling with their miserable automated system and being on hold forever and a day.   Or, getting disconnected after holding for an eternity.
 

Just remember, make an appointment first.  They may not be able to deal with walk-ins.

JungleHeart

From: JungleHeart

Feb-13

Thanks but my office is 150 miles away.  I can't drive that far; no one to help.  

 It's a good thing I didn't go to a ss office because my situation is very complex and requires a lot of documentation from outside agencies incumbent on me to procure.

I would have been sent away, having no idea how much documentation they had to have.  I do now.

I am waiting on paperwork on my pension from the retirement company - they keep mailing it and I don't receive it.

They are across the country in D.C.

SS will not accept faxes. 

I'm so frustrated.  They CAN deny my claim if this documentation is not received in a timely manner.

I am so stressed that I'm ready to give up = NO social security income.  Other issues have been equally frustrating.

Thanks anyway - be assured I have tried every angle for the past six weeks - and my grief just keeps compounding through all of this.

gerchgo

From: gerchgo

Feb-13

Ask them to send your pension papers where you have to sign for it, no matter who makes deluvery(USPS, FedEx, UPS).

Have you contacted public aid in your area for yourself? They could also possibly help with SS ?

JungleHeart

From: JungleHeart

Feb-13

I will request that when I call them today (if not in my mail today).

I could never qualify for public aid or assistance in this state.  You have to be below poverty level, and poverty level means dirt poor.

I am getting very discouraged.

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