The Combined Effects Of AS And A Toxic Fundamentalist Religious Upbringing
I am an independent thinker. I have chosen my place far outside the cognitive box, away from the conformity inside. People who are insignificant for me cannot hurt me not matter what insults they throw at me.
But a committed relationship with emotional attachment is a different situation. My AS husband is the one person on this globe, from whom I need respect, esteem and appreciation. Instead he bombards me with insults like calling me an idiot, shithead, irrational, immoral, not trustworthy, warped, deranged, mentally imbalanced, in need of therapy and more. He seems to think that frequent repetitions make his insults more effective.
These insults obviously have the goal to shatter my self-confidence and my self-esteem, probably he is himself not even aware of this goal. I know that his insults are nothing more than bullsh*t. He cannot make me doubt myself, because I feel good the way I am and I have not intention to change.
Being insulted instead of cherished by the most significant person in my life hurts deeply. Therefore I started this forum to get some compensation and counterbalance to the excessive amount of insults. I know I sound pathetic. But it really made my day when recently in another forum I was called a ‘powerful mind’.
My text ‘The Plight Of A Wife In An AS/N-AS Relationship Under The Combined Effects Of Darwinian Fitness And A Detrimental Religious Upbringing’ has been read more than 100 times but so far nobody has posted any reply. Please give me some friendly feedback. I welcome any balm on my wounds in the form of sincere appreciation of my thoughts, ideas, insights and reasoning.