Confused malcontents swilling Chardonnay while awaiting the Zombie Apocalypse.
Try those last 2 again?
(Courtesy of Ada)
What philosophy! I Love this Japanese Doctor ~*Q*: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
*A*: Heart only good for so many beats, and that's it... Don't waste time on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart not make you live longer; it's like saying you extend the life of a car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.
*Q*: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
*A*: Oh no. Wine made from fruit. Fruit very good. Brandy distilled wine, that means they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Grain good too. Bottoms up!
*Q*: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
*A*: Can't think of one, sorry. My philosophy: No pain...good!
*Q*: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
*A*: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetables be bad?
*Q*: Is chocolate bad for me?
*A*: You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!
*Q*: Is swimming good for your figure?
*A*: If swimming good for a figure, explain whale to me.
*Q*: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
*A*: Hey! 'Round' is also a shape!
Well... I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you had about food and diets.
Finally, the Japanese Doctor summed up: Look mister, Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Beer in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride my life was"!!!!!?
Eat whatever you like because you will still DIE, don't allow motivational speakers deceive you.
1. The inventor of the treadmill died at the age of 54
2. The inventor of gymnastics died at the age of 57
3. The world bodybuilding champion died at the age of 41
4. The best footballer in the world Maradona, died at the age of 60.
5. KFC inventor died at 94.
6. Inventor of Nutella brand died at 88
7. Imagine, cigarette maker Winston died at age of 102
8. Inventor of opium died at 116 in an earthquake
9. Hennessey inventor dies at 98.
How did these doctors come to the conclusion that exercise prolongs life?
The rabbit is always jumping up and down but it lives for only 2 years and the turtle doesn't exercise at all, lives 400 years.
So, take some rest, Chill, Stay cool, eat, drink, and enjoy your life. You will still die