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Sending invites without asking a player first   Friends

Started 5/6/19 by MaryCricket (Wisp1463); 3437 views.

What really bother me so much is this

If a player has the time to send invites  then they should have the time to check  to if their invite has been accepted.

I really do not understand  why they do  not bother seeing if they got their invite got approved, I have seen my refusal of invite from a person sitting in the deleted file for weeks.

I always look to see if mine got accepted. if not I remove asap.

Several years ago I sent out an invite without asking ,  a day later she refuse so I remove it and send another invite and she refused again, so I chuckled to myself and thought okay she do not want me to be her friend, no worries, did not take it personal and moved on. So that day on I  HAVE NEVER EVER sent out a invite to a player without asking first

If there was one wish I could make in the Chamber of wishes in the Mystery Chamber I would this

I wish players would reach out first before sending an invite.  I also wish that Big Fish Elephant Games Developers Team would do something extra have a pop up box saying this

  Are you sure you want to delete this friend  and to let us permanently delete the player from our game our selves not waiting for Big Fish to do this for us 

I might get a backlash here but I don't care 

End of  ranting 

 by the way I have been wanting to say this for a very long time

Also let me add one more thing, 6 months ago some one send me an invite 1 month after to my game that was on my computer that was crashed, different id number, and she lost her game because she sent an invite to my crashed game ( crashed computer). if she reach out to me first she would not have lost her game.

I agree that everyone who extends an invite should check to see whether that invite was accepted or not.  I suppose it's possible that some players don't realize they can remove their invite if the player they sent it to declined them.  That could prevent a backup, instead of waiting for BF to clear out that list.  I always checked my invites to see if they were accepted or not.  And I think most players on BF wanted to be able to remove players who were deleted for various reasons.  That's still a good idea.

I mentioned in another thread about it being a good idea for BF to delete obsolete games on their servers.  Maybe if they did that there wouldn't be so many game crashes or "hijackings" as many have recently experienced. 

Nona (Waldmeister)

From: Nona (Waldmeister)


I have rarely asked via pm first. When I was looking for other friends than Just John BF forum had just closed and I hadn't yet figured out what "see you on delphi" was supposed to mean. So I sent out invites to all people who had last posted their ID on the old forum.

When I came to delphi I contacted the consortium in a thread and later added personal, seasonal and Ice Breath friends usually via a thread by posting my ID or using the ID posted by others there.

I think it is ok to respond to openly posted IDs without rechecking via pm.

The way things seem to be going a crashed game can happen in oh so many unpredictable ways - a simple attempt to download an update can be all it takes. But you are right, one risk less is a good thing.


From: mmpendo


I, too, have been guilty of inviting friends without requesting permission ahead of time - when their ID are posted in threads requesting new friends. 

When I started playing MC ~ 1 year ago, my old friend CHARLIE (who has played MC since the beginning) vouched for me so I got many friends quickly. Thank goodness otherwise I would have had a very difficult time on my own and without the enormous generosity of my new found friends.

Now I need to shut down my wish list every few days to catch up  (I gift 2-3 times per day). 

It's all good (We're through the worst of the CC).

Absolutely, all the threads asking for friends, either long-term or event, are great and no pm necessary.  They do make it a little easier for new players to get a leg up on their friendslist.  I'm very leery of accepting an invite from someone I don't know, or don't recognize.  In that case at least, it would be a good idea to send a note first.  Assuming they're on the forum.  I've had a few strange invites from people with the blank avatar and names that made me wonder if they're really legitimate players.  

Still, it would be a good thing if everyone who sends out invites checks to see if they've been added or declined.  At least BF removes them eventually, but it would be nice to timely maintain it.

Nona (Waldmeister)

From: Nona (Waldmeister)


I could do with some advice. Two of my friends have gone to the invite folder. Shall I delete them and reinvite them or wait? At least one of them has been a regular and the other one an occasional gifter. Maybe I got deleted by mistake or shown red on their games or just disappeared from their list.

I agree with you, in the beginning I have reached out to many players that were on BF forum and became their friends, even here I have reply to many other players asking to be their friends.  I also agree with you to respond to openly posted IDs without  via pm.

 But now my three games ID numbers no where to be found, except my MaryCricket is on Facebook PC list ( I have indicated not accepting anymore invites) by my other two games ID is now where to be found and that is so scary with all the lost games, every time I open my games I am always afraid I might be next so just for precaution, I accept then I delete . 

I would, I would  then send them an invite


From: AEGram


Nona.....I would write down the ID......delete it from your "invite" folder and send out another invite. If you do not see them added to your social cards after a couple of days, then I would assume they are clearing their friends cards to downsize from any SE players they added. Some people have a problem when they try to maintain over X amount of friends.


I have occasionally , deleted someone unintentionally. Usually I catch it quickly... but on a few occasions, not until next GMT gifting cycle.

I have an old game, that was transferred to iPhone,  and need to be very careful, not to delete someone.

 A couple of times I was deleted, and not added back. I pm the person, accepted back... 

and, had deleted a few. I thought we’re gone from the game, and they pm’d me, I accepted invite.

I like AEG’s advice, food for thought. bouquet