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Through misting eyes, I gaze across at the Cap’n who is bellowing out another command at me.
But what he is saying makes sense!
My first poster attempt mentioned money and that is not suitable, so I pass over to Angel the second poster and say:
“This one please”
Then I turn to the Cap’n and rather more forcibly than perhaps necessary glare at him and state:
“Do you not listen to me!
“In that outfit you WILL get caught, even just because you are toting those stupid pistols around with you!
“We need stealth NOT confrontation!
“Most of the plan is good with you wandering around seemingly at random.
“With me being outside the Bone Kingdom gates to make a swift extraction and rescue you in case of an emergency - this is all that is necessary.
“We do NOT want to put either of the girls in danger in that diabolical place!”
“So, this is what we WILL DO!!”
I am shouting at him by the time I finish saying all this!
“This is what I propose.
“You will wear a Lion Tamers outfit or a Ring Masters outfit.
“You will go into the Bone Kingdom with one of Charlie’s tame big cats on a leash. The cat will have the pearl necklace as part of its collar.
With your amulets open you will tell Charlie where to go and which way the big cat will face in order to get a picture.
“Charlie can then relay to the cat what to do.
“If anyone should approach you a growl from your pet should suffice. If not let it shows its teeth!”
As you go you distribute the leaflets to people and to any doors you may find interesting.
When you’re satisfied and finished just leave the Kingdom with the cat.
“IF there is any trouble I will immediately know because my amulet will be on open mode and come to your rescue.
“We will leave your cat escort to escape as it will know where to go having ‘marked’ its route and will then be in full ‘hostile mode’ – which means arms and legs being chewed!
“What do you think Charlie? Will this work?”
Charlie points out that the cats go as a pair!
Which will be too much for Cap’n Bob alone.
So Charlie gives me the brilliant idea
She goes along as his assistant and so can keep a close eye on them and guide them minute by minute without us having to relay all the information to each other.
My fears about having a dear little old lady waddle along side him (what a mature couple they will make!) are obviated as her pets are VERY protective and also lethal!
Charlie (NO skirt, no skimpy outfit, with boots!)
Wow! PTG sure is taking his 2ic duties very seriously....positively yelling at Cap like that!! But, I must admit, his plan does make much more sense. Sorry, Cap, I agree with PTG that you should change your outfit. Besides, that alleviates the "hair" problem you were encountering for your sharp shooter costume and you must admit, a lion tamer outfit is much better than a clown costume. So, which one of PTG's choices do you like best?. Hmmm???????.......
Captain, I've been thinking about hiding your identity in the new outfit. Many old school ringmasters AND lion tamers have large handlebar mustaches. We can use makeup to to place cat claw "scars" on your face to blur the remainder. With a large brimmed type hat, it should not be obvious as to who you are...
Looking at your outfit Charlie I can't help but think that for OUR purposes you could wear something a little more stylish?
Your garb needs "topping off" so I have been to Kayleys and made a special order for this hat. It took two of her gnomes all morning to adapt it.
Some of them are cork blocks used if you go fishing but some are sugar cubes for you to suck if your tummy rumbles whilst following the Cap'n.
What do you think?
Actually, I think Charlie was hoping for something more like this if there's still time for a redo?
I sit with mouth agape then start to laugh,,,, well loks like my second in command grew some brass ones lol,,,
Humm maybe if I knew this way before I could have used it better but then again I know what a woman can do to a guy .
I just hope he does not take this yelling orders at me to far or I will have to reign in him lol can not let the others ( ROO for examole LOL ) getting away with yelling at the head honcho ,
I snicker it is good to see him take a stand and speak his mind and I do have to admit his ideas are good so I will go with The Lion Tamer and have Charlie with me to take the other cat so we look normal ROTFLMAS as if we are normal.
Okay hey PTG lower the volume and stop yelling at me * I shoot him a raised eye brow stare * to clarify my meaning.
Angel take the Poster PTG picked and I agree on and get going to your office in cloud City to ,ake the copies and Roo make sure you two get there geter done and get back
Who wants to put the fake scratches on my cheeks??
The ones on my face I say before anyone **ROO** can make a smart arse remark.
OKAY lets get this rolling and gather what we need and finalize the plans.
Opel yells soups on and I look at the time wow lunch already okay everyone break for lunch then we hit the books and get this going ,,,, Angel Roo eat before you take off and let me know if you need anything before you go.
Lion Tamer hum yep I kinda like that and having Charlie with me is a good idea.
We all sit down to eat another Opel special ,, that woman is amazing and looks so good in that outfit.
With the Cap’n chivvying us all to get ready for the foray. I pop into my Hospital room where I have laid out THE MOST spectacular Ring Master’s uniform that I could get from the HOS Repository.
My broom is having the sulks as I have swapped it for a wicked looking whip.
“It looks ridiculous on you!” is all I hear from it as I don the outfit.
I am having a bit of trouble fixing the pencil-thin moostashio on my upper lip but when all is accomplished, I just HAVE to find a mirror to admire the results!
SOOO different from my usual white huggie jacket with its voluminous pantaloons.
As I leave my room I bump into an invisible wall in the middle of the corridor.
“Ouch! You clumsy oaf!
“Can’t you see where you are going?”
It is Roo Roo as usual playing at being invisible with her beloved cloak.
“Not if you are going to continue wearing that pile of bedding!
“You are supposed to be a knife thrower NOT the invisible man
“Who would come to YOUR show to see Nothing?!”
I should not have mentioned her skills as two wicked blades pin me to the wall
“If you have torn my outfit, I will zap you and your cloak into oblivion with this hide whip!”
Only to see it shredded before my eyes to the accompaniment of chuckles and cheers from my broom!
Just as we both go into offensive/defensive mode Angel comes shimmering down the corridor in THE most revealing outfit.
Roo gasps: “You can’t go out in public wearing just that!
“You will get locked up for indecency!”
Just then the Cap’n appears and surveys the scene.
“Will you two just cool it?
“Charlie needs some help with her costume, and she won’t let me into her room to help!”
Angel and Roo begrudgingly cease their prospective fisticuffs and slope off down to her room to help.
When all is said and done, Charlie is really a home body, but I wouldn’t care to get within range of those knitting needles!
The Cap’n beams:
“Do I look good? Or do I look more than good?
“Lets load up the wagons, sort out our livestock that is coming with us, and hit the road!”
Good grief! I don't get what all the fuss is over my outfit for the "fortune teller"! Why is everybody always pickin' on me! Oh, very well then. How about this one?
I see from the Tea Room window the wagons and animals are assembled and ready for the trip.
“Mrs Fletcher – While we are gone, all our protecting wards will be in place and both my pet owl and the crow will be standing guard.
“Also Charlie has a couple of surprises ‘up her sleeve’ for any unwelcome intruders’
“But if you at any point think you are in danger, I or Roo will return immediately as the true Knights that we are!”
I get a big smile in return as she says;
“Make sure that you return with the Cap’n safe and sound, or you had better not return at all!
“AND keep Katt safe, she is not used to outdoor catering! AND bring back all my pots”
Charlie is now outside and has organised her animals.
She has Nose ‘at point’ to sniff out any trouble on the way and Beau practising her trumpeting as a clarion call to all our worthy citizens as we travel up the long winding path.
She herself has hold of Sugar and Spice on long leads. This is not necessary, but just for show, as they are tame (if you can ever truly consider a large cat to be tame!).
I am waiting for Cap’n Bob to give the command: “By the left quick march!”
But he seems to be preoccupied with something.
Then I realise what that something is. The fur on Sugar’s neck is covering our spy pearl necklace and Angel cannot view any pictures.
“NO!!! DEFINITELY NO!!!!” bellows Charlie, as the Cap’n approaches the cat with a large pair of scissors!
In a trice she has knitted a thin silk scarf from gossamer threads and tied it around Sugar’s ruff.
And gives a big grin of satisfaction as she waves her needles at him.
“Now let us go!”