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The Special Room - Origins PART 1 Oh the Absurdity!
From: Jenifer (Zarknorph)
5/22/18
PAGE 16
PTG
I look aghast at what those two prize (GOLD STAR
) idjits have just done 
With bits and pits of the mad evil-genius foe cascading all around us, I dive for my bench and cover myself as best I can with a handy towel.
At the same time I invoke who ever the powers are in this dimension saying:
“It is not my fault; I have nothing to do with it; those two asinine creatures are strangers to me (and I revoke any partnership!)”
I then implore – plead –BEG my bench to take my away as far as possible and think SOUTH POLE. I will prefer the cold compared to what is about to be inflicted upon us.
Nothing happens apart from the pitter, patter of tiny bits of genius floating to the floor.
From: Jenifer (Zarknorph)
5/22/18
PAGE 16 CONTINUED
JENIFER
PTG is glaring at me while I reapply my feathers, bells and barnacles."What?" I throw up my hands. "It's a giant red button! If I'd written it myself I still would have pressed it! Who can resist a giant red button?!"
We look back to the monitors. "Lets go get Cash and Wickerbat." PTG decides. "We can at least do that for Grim."
We look to Randy sprawled over the convenient plot device - I mean magic teleportation bench.
"Looks like we'll have to walk." I frown. "We need a map of the tunnels."
We all jump as a machine whirrs behind us, then starts spitting out paper. We wait for it to attack. Instead it stops and deposits a page into an attached tray.
I walk over and gingerly pick it up. "Hey! It's a map!"
"Voice activation." PTG nods, "Grim mentioned that."
"Get me Surf n Turf!" Randy bellows.
We all wait and look around. Nothing.
"AAWWW Craponacracker!"
We are grateful that nothing happens at that command.
From: Jenifer (Zarknorph)
5/22/18
PAGE 16 CONTINUED
PTG
I think to myself: this will only take a minute.
That old Salty guy cannot come to any harm either to himself or to the environment in such a short time.
I program the co-ordinates in for the now groaning bush, where Jenny Wren had tossed her swag. My trusty mobile bench obliges and within seconds we are alongside it.
Up periscope!
I quickly do an all-round scan and see that the coast is clear.
There going through the Castle gates is a very noisy clanking Jenny Wren, bellowing at the top of her voice the Aussie equivalent of “Ten Green Bottles” (with occasional shrieks as the non-too friendly Castle staff haul her into custody).
I approach the moaning and groaning bush and grab the sack.
From: Jenifer (Zarknorph)
5/22/18
PAGE 17
PTG
My younger female partner seems to know where all the explosives in the Castle are stashed and is shelling out diamonds like she was rich in order to get them all together quickly. 
She is working on my Cunning Plan
to transport us into the parallel never-never land where we hope Grim or the relevant bits and pieces of her are located. I in the meantime have sat myself down next to Randy and am listening carefully to what he is mumbling about.
He seems to be singing an Olde-time Music Hall ditty which begins:
"Mud, mud, glorious mud
Nothing quite like it for cooling the blood
So follow me follow, down to the hollow
And there let me wallow in glorious mud"
From: Jenifer (Zarknorph)
5/23/18
PAGE 17 CONTINUED
PTG
I spy Jenny Wren wandering the streets of the town, obviously freed from recent captivity.
She seems to be doing what she likes to call “window shopping” and what I call a “waste of time”.
But what do I know? I am a mere male of the species, and it seems that it is making her happy and calmer after her ordeals with the Fishing Net and eagle.
Full of suspicion as I know it would be quite a coup for the Castle Guards if we were all rounded up, I gaze over the entire area using the monitors.
But she seems to be alone, so Randy and I go down to meet her. 
We need to talk!
I am just about to recommend that we locate our other partner Grim from whichever dimension she is presently located, when I am rudely interrupted by her brazenly calling out to the world at large that her new quest is to conquer the root of all evil: Medusa!
I hate to disillusion her but that is just not possible without special equipment, which we don’t have, and someone to fill the spare vacancy for a Greek God with a magic sword and shield.
From: Jenifer (Zarknorph)
5/23/18
PAGE 17 CONTINUED
JENIFER
My team mates have abandoned me!
They have gone to the pub.
I respect that.
I am not, however, listless. I click the light blue notch on my multicoloured pen.
Okay:
1. Find Grim
2. Who has been spiking our ice cream?
3. Does the 'super-blah-very-blah-evil-blah-yeah-I can't-remember-whatever-guy' have a cousin, a pet, or an even more evil OverLord?
4. Are we in danger from Medusa?
5. Where have my team mates gone?
"Mah... Mah... Mah... Mah... Mah... Mah..."
I await the lack of Tinnitus.
GRIM
I close a door behind me. I am in the Winter Garden. I whirl.There is no door behind me.
The Winter Garden is
From: Jenifer (Zarknorph)
5/28/18
PAGE 18
JENIFER
My slumber is disturbed by a spectacular fireworks display.10,000 hits! It is clearly the work of PTG. I wonder about the poor soul he is beating and how he got the strength to deliver such a flurry of blows. I conclude he is probably trying to get more plot out of Captain PogoRandy.
The ringing in my ears has abated, however my outfit is very singed. I place the crown on my head and look down from the Broken Statue. I need to go shopping, however I am surrounded by a minefield.
My rabbit jumps down from my lap. "HOPPY!!! NOOOOO!!!!"
I wince and squint through protective fingers covering my eyes as Hoppy navigates the mounds of earth and hops off towards the Metro Station.
"Huh." I shrug and jump down from the statue. Just follow Hoppy's lead. "No problem!" I step forward.
I am propelled over the City Square and into the Train Cabin. Unfortunately my entrance is head first and through the roof.
The Tinnitus is back.
It takes a good while for me to jimmy myself out of my current predicament and fall face first onto a spur. The cat does not approve of my language. I eat the donut.
A new outfit is in order. The Passenger Car has all the base material I need. The skinned Teddy Bear makes a cheeky new corset and the blanket is easily fashioned into a wrap skirt. My adornments are dragonflies, bows and roses, with the odd ruby ring and golden fish. I wear the spurs as I have a set. But the pièce de résistance is the belt - I have added a track to it and a working train rotates my waist and whistles when I least expect it.
I am ready to rejoin the fray… I use a clothespin and trim the edges.
From: Jenifer (Zarknorph)
5/28/18
PAGE 18 CONTINUED
GRIM
"STAY PUT!" PTG commands.
And with a shimmer and a whoosh, PTG, his bench, two ferrets, and a hefty supply of snowballs arrive in the Tavern. The ferrets do little war dances when they see me and tackle my knees. I feel relaxed for the first time in days.
"Hop on," PTG says. "Next stop is Jenifer."
"What about Randy?"
We both look toward the bar. Salty has now slid to the floor, snoring. The caterwauling turns out to be a cat caught beneath him. Randy is somehow sprawled across three bar stools, and may actually be awake, but also a little green around the gills. Too much time spent with Ellie, perhaps.
PTG makes an executive decision. "We'll leave him here. I haven't had a chance to install seatbelts on this thing, yet."
I sit. Cash stashes himself in my backpack, but Wickerbat insists on being held and cuddled. What a love sponge he is! If only he didn't bite everyone else…
PTG puts his hands on his temple and - Shimmer, whoosh!
"Cooo-eee, Jenifer! Jenny Wren!" yells PTG. Echoes bounce down the tunnel and back.
Wickerbat suddenly scrabbles up my front and buries himself in the backpack. My long ears prick (and my thumbs as well). I catch PTG's arm, indicate that he should be quiet, and twitch a veil of local universum over the bench. One thin layer of reality away, someone hurries along the dim tunnel, cloak swirling dramatically. Two or three hours pass before I sigh and release the local universum, but since I can't actually hold my breath that long, it's more likely 40 seconds at most.
From: Jenifer (Zarknorph)
5/28/18
PAGE 18 CONTINUED
RANDY
In between and banging me acheing head on the side of this ever desending blimp and screaming very off colour insults at Jen the maniac of lost it totally with sprinkles still clinging to her upper lip that is now curled in a snarl and a look of I want to KILL you in her crazy eyes and trying to keep the tip of the spear head from doing any more damage and trying to grab Jen by the throat and drag her to Murks lair and back, THINK MAN THINK FAST what can I do = beside trottel this mad hatter of a woman,,,I sneak a peek over the side,
not a good thing to do seeing I am Army and used to my boots being on solid ground NOT 50 feet in the air flying over a very pointed top of a roof,,, ohhhhhhhhh >>>>>>>>>> grabs for Jens neck <<<<<<<<<<<<<< ohhhhhhhh I swear if I ever get us out of this mess this wacky woman has gotten us well me into and before I kill her I will see her hog tied , chained, shackeled, boiled in oil and lost so far in the special room that even Nurse Kracket will never find her,,,THINK CAP THINK ,, YES YES YES got it look around and see all these chests filled with coins, diamond stamps, weight =yes get rid of the weight I grab as many coins as I can with out letting go of the spear shaft and throw them over the side, one chest done, more coins, this is to slow Jen you wretched woman grabs some coins throw them over board, I get a WHAT??? stare , oh lord help me I am GOING TO SO KILL HER, coins=weight=fall from the sky get it?? Now grab and toss, NO NO not the stamps I can use them to patch this hole you made me make, you throw I will start licking ,,
OMG yucky I just hope there are enough stamps to patch this hole untill ,, no no no this is NOT working to much weight still,an 
From: PTG (anotherPTG)
6/16/18
PAGE 19
GRIM
When I return to the Square, I discover that the park bench has gone off on its own, perhaps in search of its master. I'll have to find my own way to the Elvyn Forest, the one place in the current MC world not accessible to me by tunnel.
At least the ferrets are with me. The Doll Showcase catches my eye; I can always use a few extra gears and screwdrivers, I think. While the ferrets rummage among the dolls and toys, I happen to look up to see a personage in a dramatic purple cloak enter the Square.
I sink down behind the window display. Cash and Wickerbat slink into my backpack. We exit the HOS without finishing it and slip out a back door. In the alley behind the doll shop is a red telephone booth which serves as one entrance to the tunnels, when you dial the right number. Keeping one eye on the shop's back door, I pop in and punch numbers. Nothing happens. I try three more times.
Then the back door of the doll shop opens.
RANDY
MUNTINY my patootie , there is only ONE captain in this ??? now wait a cotton pickin minute I still have not figured out what in Sam'a Hill I am seeing and where I am besides crashed into a tower everything is turned around bottom is top , right is left, center is oh who in H*** knows , fingers start to slip and I start to sweat, I swear the day I catch that crazy loonie tone of a NOT well dressed wench she will curse the day we met,,, OH NOOOOOOOOO fingers cramp I CAN NOT LET GO I sneak a peek over my left shoulder is it my right ??? look straight into the gaping mouth of one of two fire breathing DRAGONS , wait wait guys I am one of the good guys and I do not taste good even with salt and butter I swear, fat lot of good that did they are crawling closer oh great now they are drooling thinking they have an easy meal, my mind is awhirl with how did I get down from this roof top ,away from those Dragons, and NOT fall into those two waiting wolves, JENIFER I SWEAR I AM GOING TO KILL YOU OR DROWN YOU,,sratch that she already one a ribbon for that dive yeah right must have made goo goo eyes at the judge,, I hear heavy foot steps OH GREAT I have been spoted by the Castel Gaurds now how am I going to explain this mess Jen got me into and how am I going to pay for this damage to the blimp that the Gnome sends to the blimp stop and unload cargo at a heavy price I might add, oh I am in DEEP DOO DOO with the MC Honchoos got a feeling I am going to pay dearly for this mess but nothing compared to what that catawalling wrench is going to pay,,THINK MAN this is NOT REAL this NOT REAL I am NOT IN A BASKET HANGING INCHES AWAY FROM BEING ROASTED AGAIN,, I hear voices on the wind, Grim? what ? you think Jen is a hero and I am the bad guy , oh the shame as I hang my head ,, OH OH cramp cramp more words,,, PTG missing?? oh double great I am really done for now,come on Cap think , this twin world we got shucked into by Murk I am sure of that , is all mirrors, backwards , and sillo,, owieeeeee as a flame grazes me hinnie,,,oh well thank you you uggy lizard that was the push I needed to get back in the basket,,okay now what , grab that spear come on and get me I will poke yer eyeballs out,,,I peek over the side towards Cloud City and the Square just in time to see a rather large bunny tail disapear into the Fabric Shop ,, groans a female shoping guess I will be stuck here for hours,,,
PTG
As I haul myself out of the briny onto the landing strip of this place, I turn round and scan my whereabouts.
I see in the distance across a bay the Harbor lighthouse, so I do have a reference point, but it is covered in a very strange shimmering mist.
Anyway, I take a couple of steps past the little waif towards the (NOT pearly) gates and notice a rather broken down boat on the right with a strange looking female occupant (Well she does have a female shape!).
As the little waif won’t say any more than to repeatedly ask whether or not I am the Spirit of Atlantis, I decide to go over there and have a little chat in order to find out where on earth (or otherwise) I am.
Suddenly, in my head, alarms bells ring out , and a deep voice whispers: “I wouldn’t do that if I were you!”
I am sufficiently fey to recognize my inner guardian angel speaking and beat a hasty retreat, but not before noticing a large hole in the side of the boat.
One of my strengths is that I can put two and two together and make five very quickly.
I recall Ellie, the amorous eel , telling us of the monster Medusa reclining in splendor and waiting for her next meal by some strange shore.
This must be she!!!
The last 100 steps to the top of the hill are very quickly accomplished
I gaze on a countryside vista the like of which I have never seen before. It is an idyll and I confidently expect that I will soon be surrounded by nymphs and shepherds coming away!
But nothing happens to break the utter stillness of my surroundings so I decide to have a little doze by the stream and analyze my present predicament.
My last conscious thought is whether Major Tom is Cap’n Bob’s superior and is there a Ground Control that I can contact?
JENIFER
I spend about ten minutes in a general dithering panic. It needed to be done.
Captain PogoRandy's monitor shows him fighting off imminent digestion with a spear.
Grim's monitor shows her dangerously close to the purple cloaked food spiker with unknown motives.
PTG's monitor is blank.
I collect myself. No idea how my arm fell off, but I put it back on.
Grim is closest.
I race out of HQ and pelt towards the City Square.
I see the purple cloaked figure rummaging through the Doll Showcase.
Pure adrenaline is my decision maker now. I hurl myself at the shadowy figure and we both burst out of the back door.
A startled Grim is in a red phone box.
"Got 'im!!" I stand up proudly with the purple cloak in hand. However the perpetrator is not inside it. "Aw craponacracker!"
We both look to the door of the Doll Showcase closing.
"We've got him on the run!" I cry to Grim. "Love the new digs!"
Grim ruffles her doublet with a smile and we barrel through the door and give chase.
There is no sign of anyone in the City Square. Three possible directions, not including tunnels.
We are considering what to do when t- Edited June 16, 2018 4:37 am by PTG (anotherPTG)