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I hear a very loud ZAp ZIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT and turn around to see PTG hovering just above the ground arms and legs straight out shaking like he is doing the hoochie coochie and teeth clacking and oh dear look at his silver main or should I say his grey red black tipped Mohawk and sparkles to boot.
Out of the corner of my eyes I see our playful ellefunck charging PTG and WHOOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH lets PTG have it .
Well the flames are out but poor Ptg going hurt tomorrow maybe Charlie can make him a temp wig to cover what I am sure will be a some what spot and bald head.
I am sure Charlie has enough wool or she might knit him a cap lol.
Doc ,, K ratchet and me are trying so hard not to burst out laughing cause as you all know been there done that and wrote the book and it does not tickle I would not want to add insult to injury but daumnnnnnnn it is funny to see ... now I know what I looked like when I got Zapped.
I call Frost to come bust the barrier so no one else gets zapped.
That being taken care of I hear Opel stomping up behind me and saying got it covered Cap I will fix Mr PTG up right as rain you and the others go inside I made you all a light lunch now off with you.
ROT ROUH I spy Opel's fix all cure all *** toxic waste*** in her hand oh craponacracker as if my poor doorknob has not suffered enough he now faces that rank rancid potion of Opel's it is horrid but it does work.
We hear PTG scream NO NO NO OPEL I AM FINE AND I DO NOT NEED THAT===GURGLE GURGLE as Opel pours the potion in his mouth and to be sure he swallows she pinches he nose and clamps her huge hand over his mouth.
I shudder poor PTG know what ya goin through .
WITH A SIGH OF RELIEF, I SEE THE BARRIER DISAPPEAR, TOO BAD PTG DID NOT NOTICE IT WAS STILL IN PLACE BEFORE HE TRIED TO LEAVE THE TEA ROOM. ELLIE WAS JUST TRYING TO SHOW HER LOVE FOR US BUT IT IS QUITE A SHOCK WHEN SHE DOES. TOO BAD IT WAS NOT THOSE IDIOTS FOULING HER HOME SHE ATTACKED.
THEN I LOOKED AGAIN, AND LAUGHED LONG AND HARD. HER LITTLE ONES WERE HAVING FUN WITH THE GUARDS. THEIR ZAPS WERE NOT AS POWERFUL AS ELLIE'S BUT THEY STILL HAD EFFECT. THE GUARDS NOT ONLY WERE FOULING THE MOAT BUT WERE SQUAWKING, LIKE A FLOCK OF STARLINGS IN THE FALL, AND FLAYING AROUND IN THE WATER SO MUCH THEY WERE GOING TO DROWN IF SOMEONE DOES NOT COME TO THEIR RESCUE.
THE MORE THEY STRUGGLED THE MORE THEY GOT SHOCKED.
THEN I THOUGHT TO ELLIE, BEST GATHER YOUR LITTLE ONES AND GO TO THE FOUNTAIN, THE WATER THERE IS CLEANER, AND YOU DO WANT THOSE WHO ARE FOULING IT GONE DO YOU NOT.
WITH THAT THE ZAPPING STOPPED THE THE GUARD AGAIN WERE MAKING THEIR WAY OUT OF THE MOAT.
GOOD GIRL ELLIE. NOW JUST LET THE MESS SETTLE AND YOUR HOME WILL BE AS IT WAS.
NOW FOR SOME FOOD, AND FRESH COFFEE.
I GUESS I WILL ASK PTG IF HE WOULD LIKE A NICE WOOL WATCH CAP TO KEEP HIS HEAD WARM TILL HIS HAIR GROWS BACK. ELLIE SURE FRIED IT.
COME TO THINK OF IT I DO HAVE THE MAGIC NEEDLES. OK, NEEDLES USE THE WHITE WOOL. MAKE A WATCH CAP WITH A FLAP DOWN THE BACK TO COVER HIS NECK TO KEEP IT WARM. AND DOG EARS ON THE SIDES TO KEEP HIS EARS WARM.
IN JUST A FEW MINUTES IT WAS DONE. I TAKE IT TO THE TABLE WHERE THE CAP IS. HERE GIVE THIS TO PTG WHEN HE SHOWS UP. SINCE THE HAT WAS YOUR IDEA, HOPE THIS IS WHAT YOU WERE THINKING OF. LAY IT NEXT TO THE CAP. IF YOU NEED ME I WILL BE IN THE BARN. THEN TURN AND LEAVE THROUGH THE KITCHEN. THANKING OPAL AND KAT FOR THE LUNCH. OPAL HANDS ME A THERMOS OF COFFEE. I LEAVE SMILING TO MYSELF.
I WAS HAVING A BALL WATCHING FROM THE TEA ROOM WINDOW.
IT WAS HYSTERICAL WATCHING THOSE IDJOTS TRYING TO AVOID GETTING ZAPPED AND TRYING TO SWIM AND NOT DROWN.
THEN I SEE ELLIE'S LILL ONES JOIN THE FUN MAN WHAT A BALL THEY WERE HAVING EVEN THOUGH THERE ZAP'S WHERE NOT AS STRONG YET AS MAMMA'S BUT THEY SURE WERE DOING THE TRICK.
THERE FUN STOPPED WHEN CHARLIE TOLD ELLIE BETTER GATHER THE KIDDIES AND GET TO CLEANER WATER AND LET THE MOAT SETTLE DOWN AND THE THET COULD GO BACK TO A FRESH CLEAN HOME.
MY SIDES HURT FROM LAUGHING SO HARD I DID NOT HEAR CHARLIE COME TO MY TABLE,,, SHE PLACED A CAP BY MY ARM AND SAID HERE YA GO YOU CAN GIVE THIS TO PTG SEEING IT WAS YOUR IDEA.
GOOD THING I DID NOT HAVE A MOUTH FULL OF TEA OR IT WOULD HAVE SPLATTERED ALL OVER.
A CAP WITH A BUILT IN NECK WARMER AND PUPPY EAR FLAP TO KEEP HIS EARS WARM,, INGENIOUS BUT DO I GIVE HIM A BONE WITH IT??? *weg***
I WATCH CHARLIE HEAD BACK TO THE CRITTERS WITH HER BOXED LUNCH FROM MISS KATT AND OPEL AND A VERY LARGE THERMOS OF COFFEE.
i FINISH MY TEA ,,, GRAB THE CAP AND GO LOOKING FOR PTG HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
i WALK AROUND LOOKING FOR MY DOORKNOB.
I SO WANT TO SET HIS NEW HAT CHARLIE MADE HIM ON HIS HEAD .
NOW WHERE IN HELL IS THAT MAN HIDING OH PTGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG WHERE ARE YOU HIDING I HAVE A GIFT FOR YOU .
COMONE HERE BOY COME GET IT.
HUMM MAYBE HE IS THE HOSPITAL WING LETS GO SEE.
I WALK THE HALLS IN THE DIRECTION OF PTG'S ROOM AND EVERY ONE I PASS BOBS THE HEAD IN A HELLO THEM WALK AWAY GIGGLING??
WHAT IS IT THEY FIND SO FUNNY,,, DO I HAVE SPINACH IN ME TOFFIES???
IS MY NOSE ON BACKWARDS??
I LOOK DOWN NOPE GARAGE DOOR CLOSED WHEW,,,,,,,,,,
THEN IT HITS ME GOT TIRED OF CARRYING THE CAP SO I SLAPPED IN ON MY HEAD KINDS CROOKED TO .
AS I PASSED THE NURSES STATION I SAW MY REFLECTION IN THE DOOR WELL LETS JUST SAY I SPENT THE NEXT HALF HOUR HOWLING ON THE FLOOR AND EVER TIME I GOT UP I WOULD SEE MY SELF AND HOWL AGAIN.
ANY ONE GOT A DEPENDS I MIGHT NEED IT.
WOHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH COUGH COUGH WOHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
OH MY CHEEKS HURT WOHAHAHAHA OH MY POOR SIDES WOHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
JUST HEARD FROM THE CAP. SO ELLIE AND HER BROOD LIKE WORMS AND LARVA. THE WORMS SHOULD BE EASY, IF WE FIND LARVA THAT WILL BE A BONUS.
I CALL SNOOP AND AND NOSE. SORRY TROUBLE BUT UNTIL YOU CAN STAY OUT OF TROUBLE YOU MUCH STAY WHERE BABY CAN WATCH YOU.
THE THREE OF US GO, ME WITH MY BAG AND AN EMPTY BUCKET. AND HEAD TO THE EDGE OF THE WOODS. I ASK SNOOP AND NOSE TO DIG HOLES. AS THEY DO I GATHER THE WORMS AND A FEW LARVA THE TOSS BEHIND THEM. INTO THE BUCKET, WITH JUST ENOUGH OF THE DAMP SOIL TO COVER THEM. WHEN I THINK WE HAVE ENOUGH I TELL THE BOYS, OK, GO WADE IN THE STREAM TO CLEAN OFF. OR IT WILL BE BATHS FOR BOTH OF YOU. OFF THEY GO AND CHASE ONE ANOTHER BACK TO THE ENCLOSURE IN THE SMALL STREAM THAT RUNS THROUGH IT.
I LAUGH AT THE SIGHT OF THEM. I WILL HAVE TO TOWEL THEM OFF ON MY RETURN SINCE IT SEEMS WHOEVER IS CHASING CATCHES THE OTHER BY KNOCKING OFF BALANCE IN THE STREAM.
I FILL THE HOLES BACK IN AND TAKE THE BUCKET TO THE FOUNTAIN, NOPE THE MOAT MUST HAVE SETTLED SO I GO TO THE EDGE AND CALL ELLIE.
IN SHE COME WITH HER BROOD IN TOW. ELLIE FOR YOUR GREAT HELP TODAY I HAVE BROUGHT YOU WHAT THE CAP. SAID WAS A TREAT FOR YOU AND DUMPED THE BUCKET OF WORMS AND LARVA INTO THE WATER. SUCH SPLASHING AND DASHING. THEN ALL WAS QUIET.
WELL I GUESS THAT WAS A HIT. AND HEAD BACK TO THE BARN TO DRY OFF A COUPLE OF VERY WET K-NINES.
So much for trying to warn the others!
Once more I am poleaxed by Cap’n Bob’s over an enthusiastic elongated fish charged with electricity.
I had the misfortune to be recognised as one of my leader’s friends and am cuddled by several feet of eeliness.
The net result is that I am zapped into unconsciousness with my last memory being of burnt hair.
When I surface back into consciousness, I find myself being held down by very muscular arms and fed foul poisons by a female harpy with the admonition that “it is good for me”!
Still struggling into a more modest position, seeing that my huggie jacket is burnt to a crisp, the Cap’n with his usual silly grin plastered all over his face slaps some sort of wool cap on me and then sits back roaring with laughter.
My body is on fire, my mind is bemused. I want PEACE AND QUIET in a haven of rest
My Hospital Room is what I most desire – So with gurgles and chortles of feminine laughter surrounding me I slide over to the far wall, and before anyone can stop me pass through an aperture that will then lead me to the Hospital Wing.
But I know that they will think that my room is the destination so I will fool them. I head for the HOS Repository where there is also a comfortable chair.
Peace at last. Whatever it was that Opel forced into me seems to have done the trick as I now feel fully compos mentis!
I take off the headgear slapped onto me and feel – NOTHING!!!!!
I fish around the room to find one of the many mirrors and gaze at myself.
In the middle of my skull there is a bright red bald patch where I must have been zapped.
Charlie downstairs must have cobbled together what she thinks is an amusing solution to my cranial nakedness. I will remember my little one!
Mmmmmm! With a tonsure, I sure do look distinguished! It will make a splendid disguise in what may be my next Cunning Plan
This woolen monstrosity however looks very fetching as a scarf tied as an off-the-shoulder addition to a monk’s habit.
Time to venture forth into the corridor.
Several worthy citizens approach and on passing me fall back and bow, muttering “Your Grace!”
No howls of laughter there!
Things are looking up after my recent disasters!
As I move on I hear one of the citizens exclaim; “Did you see a shining halo just above his pate?”
Time for the CEO and his side-kick magician!
Having returned from the office to post my latest articles for The Cloud City Times, I walk in to see Miss Opel pouring something down PTG's throat and he is NOT happy about it! I also notice a huge bald spot on his head just before Cap plants some type of cap on PTG's head. Oh dear, what a scene! It's never a dull moment around here, I'm thinking to myself, as I roar with laughter. PTG takes off like he's been shot out of a cannon. I don't think I've ever seen him move so fast before! Hahahaha
Anyway, I call to Cap to let him know the news of an upcoming party has been posted and that's when he tells me there's been some changes that need to be made. He's decided that since MC has already had their own Anniversary party, thanks to Mrs. Fletcher's idea, our party will now be a combination Harvest/Halloween party! Oh great...make the ace reporter look inept! You couldn't have let me know this via amulet before I sent my articles to print?!?!?! **sigh**
OF ALL THE NERVE, I ONLY WANTED TO MAKE SURE HE DID NOT GET SUN BURNED WITH THE HAT. AND IT WAS NOT COBBLED TOGETHER. IT WAS THOUGHT OUT. SURE I COULD HAVE MADE SOMETHING TO JUST COVER THE TOP OF HIS HEAD BUT THEN HIS NECK AND EARS WOULD HAVE BURNED. JUST SEE IF I TRY TO EASE HIS DISCOMFORT AGAIN.
I SIT PICK UP MY KNITTING AND FINISH THE SECOND SOCK. THEN SELECT WARN FOR A WARM WINTER CHILDS SWEATER. AT LEAST THE PEOPLE THESE ARE INTENDED FOR WILL BE THANKFUL.
As I glide up the stairs in my new-found black cassock, I have taken the precaution of fixing a hassock to my midriff which alters my appearance greatly.
I now look like a priest!
That with my tonsure and halo give me an ethereal appearance which is reinforced by the slight zapping charges emanating from my fingers whenever I touch something metallic!
As I pass along the corridor, I notice that our worthy citizens seem to be giving me a wide berth.
What is somewhat worrying is the absence of my broom. I have called to it several times but have got no response.
Then I find that it is tucked deep down into the pocket of my robe.
As I go to fish it out, it SHRIEKS: “NNOooo– don’t touch me!!!!”
“Your fingers will burn me to a crisp! Let me get you some gloves”
I pause for a moment digesting this new information which will come in VERY handy for my new Cunning Plan!
Just as I get to the stairs below the CEO’s suite of rooms, I am faced by a contingent of the Praetorian guards.
On seeing me their sergeant rubs his hands with glee and orders his men to seize me. In his eyes he is counting the reward for capturing me!
His men, however, start to mumble and hold back saying that I am not me! But a demon that looks like me.
Swearing at them he strides forward holding his hefty spear before him and hoping to prod me into submission.
The result interests even me!
I grasp his spear, which catches fire and within seconds is a pile of ash in his hands. On the floor in front of him is a puddle of melted steel which had been its pointy end.
Gasping, he falls back with his men, swearing that this is beyond his pay grade!
I reach the CEO’s door and grasp its brass handle. Within seconds there is a smouldering hole where it had just been, and I am faced by two astonished pairs of the most evil eyes I have seen for a long time!