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Susan's Steps to Freedom   Quit Stories and Journals

Started 12/4/16 by Sueuk (breatheasy12); 4145 views.
In reply toRe: msg 33
Sueuk (breatheasy12)

From: Sueuk (breatheasy12)

12/13/16

DAY 18

It's been a crazy busy two days. Christmas shopping almost completed just all the fresh food now.

I have faced triggers galore. Yesterday, it was so mild here we actually sat outside the cafe and ate our lunch. Soon after, people sat either side of us and smoked. I loved that smell of fresh smoke but !!!!! I did not want to smoke myself.

This is an amazing breakthrough. Usually it's this town where I lose my quit. There's quite a few places in  a,small area where they sell cigarettes and lighters. I usually have a panic attack and run and buy some.

Well not yesterday. I was so proud when I got home. 

Steve ..Gersheps...he wrote once about facing triggers head on and getting them out of the way. It always stuck in my mind.I remembered. I did it. 

Today when I went out...hmmmm, did I feel confident? Yes. No smell. No wanting to chain smoke.

The strangest thing of all...the calmness. Those bl++++ cigs made me a nervous wreck for years. Well, I've never been this calm. I can't make head nor tail of it. But I'm loving it. 

Thank you so much for all the support. I sincerely hope that one day I can help someone the way you have helped me.

Sending kind thoughts and good vibes to my fellow December quitters. Xx

In reply toRe: msg 34
Sueuk (breatheasy12)

From: Sueuk (breatheasy12)

12/14/16

Day 19

Slept a bit better. Seems to be  couple of bad wakeful nights then a good one. I have never had trouble sleeping so it must be my brain wanting nicotine.

That's ok..I want to experience all the pain that goes with cessation. Usually I'm not brave enough and run and buy a pack like

a big girls blouse.

No more. I want to stay for the year. I want to experience the "peace " that other people feel.

Today I'm putting up my tree and decorations. Massive triggers. Got to be done. Ordinary chewing gum and mints. ..and if I'm desperate I'll open a box of chocs.

Speak later

VentasSue

From: VentasSue

12/14/16

Hey Sue

Thought I'd just pop by to see how you're doing.  It looks like you are getting stronger and stronger in your quit.  Be good to get through this festive season and know that you've squashed a bundle more triggers.  I want you to stay for the year, too (and longer) and I think you will.

I've been reading your posts and it sounds like the children in your life are very important to you and bring you a lot of happiness.  They are the ones you should think about when the going gets tough.  It must be so much better to spend time with them smoke-free and also to know that you are not setting a bad example to them by smoking.  I know that we do this for ourselves predominantly but it's lovely to know that, by quitting, we are also helping others and improving our relationships with other people.

I hope you have a lovely, peaceful day today.  You're definitely starting to fully realise that it will get better and I promise that this is true.

Big Hugs, Suestar2star2star2star2star2star2star2star2star2star2star2

Quit 11th January 2016 

Sueuk (breatheasy12)

From: Sueuk (breatheasy12)

12/14/16

Sue

Thanks for popping over to say Hello. You are so perceptive...this little Evie and I have a special bond. We seem to share the same sense of humour and giggle constantly when we see each other. I have always been close to her Mother who is my eldest niece. 

Evie has never been around smoke and has never even seen anyone smoking. She is like a little tonic and full of fun. 

Oh Sue ...the emotions we go through on this quit journey. From proud to doubting to anxiety to regret.

I'm so happy for you that your health check had great results. You are a very lucky lady.

Thanks again Sue

Have a lovely evening.

In reply toRe: msg 35
Sueuk (breatheasy12)

From: Sueuk (breatheasy12)

12/15/16

Day 20 

I felt utterly dreadful today. I've no words to describe it. 

It would be different if it was Summer and I could dig in the garden.

Each Winter gets worse. Depressing. 

I'm made a list of things to buy in Holland and Barrett tomorrow. I will need to take out a small loan as can be such an expensive shop. Some things I have researched and some I've found out from others.

Organic Manuka honey

Cranberry juice

Pomegranate juice

Carrot juice

Ginger tea

Honeysuckle tea

B and D vitamins

Biotin

N-Acetyl-L- Cysteine

Turmeric

My list goes on but I will stop there. I'm laughing now because they say to get the highest number possible in the honey. That works out about £50 per jar. It's supposed to be good for the lungs.

In reply toRe: msg 38
Sueuk (breatheasy12)

From: Sueuk (breatheasy12)

12/15/16

It's almost bed-time. Keefy hasn't posted today. He did pledge nope this morning. I hope he's okay and just busy.

VentasSue

From: VentasSue

12/16/16

Hey Sue

I'm so sorry you had a bad day yesterday.  I do hope that today's better.  I mentioned to Marge recently that I felt that the early days of my quit where more like being in a tumble dryer than being on a roller coaster.  I really do know how you feel.

As usual, the only advice I can give, although, you'll have heard this and a million other bits of advice already, is - hang on in there and try to think positive thoughts.  It will get better and the very worse spells will not last long.  Make the most of the good spells and just keep going.  The horrid bits will lessen in intensity and how long they last.  Soon, very soon - you will start to feel some peace and you will really appreciate the good you are doing for yourself.  Also, maybe, think of Evie and how very proud she will be of you when she's older and you tell her the tale of the horrendous journey you had to undertake to quit this addiction.

I'm thinking of you and wish I could wave a magic wand to speed up the process but I can also now appreciate that we have to go through it to get to where we want to be - there are no short-cuts.  All I can say is that I truly do know what you're going through and I can promise you that it really is worth while and it does get better. 

Have a peaceful day.

Big Hugs, Suestar2star2star2star2star2star2star2star2star2star2star2

Quit 11th January 2016

Sueuk (breatheasy12)

From: Sueuk (breatheasy12)

12/16/16

Hi Sue

Your post was a lovely to read when I woke up this morning. Yes, that blxxxx nicotine monster brought me to my knees yesterday.

I think it tried every trick in the book to make me buy some ciggies. BUT I didnt. I also learned that however bad a day you have...it passes.

Today has been a super day...lovely, relaxing, busy. It was made all the more sweet because I felt so proud of myself.

Sue, your support means so much especially because I know that you and I smoked for such a long time. 

I'm wishing you a lovely weekend..

Sue

In reply toRe: msg 33
Sueuk (breatheasy12)

From: Sueuk (breatheasy12)

12/16/16

21 days today.

As Steve says.."that's your basic strong start".

I'm so happy. You would not believe that 2 consecutive days could be so different. By last evening I was so emotionally drained ...

Today...totally different. I felt good, I looked well. The day was so lovely and enjoyable.

3 blinking weeks. Well done old girl!!!

ModMarge (slowblumer)

From: ModMarge (slowblumer)

12/16/16

Hi Sue,

Just dropped in to see how you are doing and looks like you are doing fine.  It does seem that the worse of days is followed by a good one, like we healed a bit while we were going through that anguish.

Have a great smoke free day

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