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I have failed again and am so mad at myself! I quit Oct 7 and knew this was my final quit. I didn't have a cigarette for 2 months and have been smoking for the last 2 weeks. I was doing great, very confident and so proud of myself. I was sure I would not have one puff...ever! All of a sudden I was at the store buying a pack, smoked one and threw them away. I have been doing this daily for 2 weeks. It's like I have lost all resolve, my mind set is gone. I must add I am sneaking around doing this because my family would be so disappointed and I can't face that. The sneaking around is making me that much more stressed. All I think about is when I can have a moment to sneak that next cigarette. It hit me this morning I feel like a junkie, I am a junkie!
It is time to take my quit back. During my 2 months without cigarettes, I was on this forum daily, reading and taking the NOPE pledge. I felt great, no more scary chest pains, more confident, my complexion greatly improved and just looked and felt better. People even told me how healthy I looked. I didn't stink like an ashtray and I could breath. It was awesome. Why did I fail? What was I thinking? I was part of the October '16 Smoke Free Warriors. I did not post much but I was there. Congrats to all of you and please don't allow yourself to have one puff...ever.
I have to start over now and hope to join the December group, if they will have me. How do I do that?
Taking my QUIT back!
Don't be so hard on yourself, it happens and then you start again. just go to the December folder and join up the same as you did before with October. Just about all of us here have quit many times before we finally quit, sometimes it takes something drastic, other times it comes easy. I could not quit by myself and the only way I could quit was using the patches - what aids are you using?
It is ok, we are all here for you, none of us are judging you or disappointed in you, because all of us have been there in one way or another.
Hang in there and start again, we are here for you! HUGS
I know it sounds silly but it helped me in times of weakness. When I felt the urge I would sneak but without a cigarette. I would even go to the smoking area at work for 5 or 10 minutes without smoking. These places soon lost their glamor.
We are ALL JUNKIES when we smoke. It is just like getting a fix to get high. That aahh feeling of having that puff IS PART OF THE ADDICTION. WE ALWAYS WANT THAT AAHH FEELING. The problem is the addiction gets in our way when we try to carry on without it. The boost of the drug nicotine sends a rush Instantly and the aahh feeling is satisfied but, now we have to wait a longer time to get that aahh feeling from great foods, drinks, fun stuff etc. the Normal Way which takes about 20 minutes.
Waiting the craves out is tough but one by one day by day using our intellect instead of our junkie thinking we will over time learn to escape the constant voice of that nicotine monster.
Funny how once we get some success at quitting that we are never happy smokers ever again. We always feel we let ourselves down. But, YOU ARE NOT ALONE -- WE ARE HERE!!!!
Stay close to the forum -- post often to new quitters and other groups or set up your own thread. Come here several times a day and read read read. Quitting is the Point -- STAYING QUIT means having support from this forum and others that know the absolute pain in the butt that quitting truly is. Staying Quit is Stressful Too. We cannot hide from stress but we need great coping strategies so re-read everything on this forum, read The Easy Way to Quit Smoking several times, read the WhyQuit.com site and go on YouTube and watch some interesting videos on what a smokers lung looks like and other smoking related videos to keep you motivated and they help to Change Your Mindset. Staying in that quit mindset is agonizing but we have to accept this and accept that this will take time till our brain rewires and fixes our body and moves our smoking memories into the long term memory area in our brain. We have to get it out of our short term memory banks which takes time. Most addiction services say that to change a behavior it takes a minimum of three months till it becomes part of everyday thinking. This is why we say it is easier after getting through the icky three.
You can do this like all of the other long term quitters. Stay close, post, complain and by all means stay quit. You don't need cigarettes controlling your life anymore. They stink, they are expensive and they serve no purpose! Improve your self esteem by being a NOPER.
Keep these motivational quotes running through your mind constantly as it sure helped me stay quit::: BE A QUITTER, BE A NOPER, BE A SUCCESSFUL EX-Smoker. Persist, Resist, Exist. Just Don't Smoke. Smoking is no longer an Option, One leads to Thousands more!
"Quitting isn't for Sissies!" I quit poisoning myself Sept. 27, 2013
It's so easy to relapse. I've done it 4 times before this quit. We do not judge people on the forum. We support. This is not an easy addiction to overcome. There is temptation all around.
You said you were on the forum, but did you post? Posting your good and bad days and times is an important part of this forum. This is a great way for you to get more support and reassurance during your quit. Reading is great also, but if you feel a strong crave, get on the forum and post. Wait for 3 replies. Try to develop some coping skills that work for you and use them. If one doesn't work, try another and another. You will find the right one to help you.
We are all addicts and people who do not smoke do not understand our fight and frustration when we decide to quit. We on the forum understand and I found that out once I joined.
I'm close to year 2 and it's been a hard battle. I'm even having some difficult times now, but not nearly as bad as last year. It does get easier. My thought of smoking at times are there, but the desire is gone. Still fighting through some of it though. I plan to keep moving forward. I don't ever want to go back to the beginning.
Stay with us. Don't beat yourself up and stop being disappointed that you relapsed. It's OK. It's all part of the learning process.
Write more and keep us posted. If you need us, give a shout out and someone is always here. Real and join in some of the other group discussions. We love new comers to join us in our conversations.
Quit date: Feb. 18, 2015
We are all Junkies here at the Forum, one puff from relapse. You quit for a good amount of time, Julie. Nicotine addiction is a very strong pull, physically, mentally and emotionally. It is so insidious and is intertwined in every aspect of our life. Come join the December 2016 ex smokers. Knowing your enemy greatly increases your chances of defeating it.
My heart goes out to you but thank you for, once again, convincing me that smoking is a horrible, evil addiction.
Forgive yourself for what has happened - its in the past. Live in the moment and just don't smoke a minute/hour/day at a time. As everyone has said, the chances of success are so much greater (probably, may even change from 'chances' to 'certainties') when we make quitting our No. 1 priority and stick very, very close to this Forum. I could never have done it without you all here.
You obviously don't want to smoke, so don't. Life, as you have already seen, is so very much better once we get through those first tricky few weeks. At times, the pains of withdrawals seem to be endless but, I promise you, they do lessen in frequency and intensity. Once you're through the worse part, you'll be thrilled at the benefits freeing ourselves of this addiction brings.
Enjoy the December group - they really sound like lovely people and the support we get from our Quit Buddies is priceless.
So, hope to see you around the Forum and never forget that we are all here for you and understand how you feel.
Big Hugs, Sue
Quit 11th January 2016
Hi Lyndy, thank you for your kind words and support. My new quit date is tomorrow using the patch.
What ever it takes. I may have to try that without the cigarette. :)