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Relapse Bender   Quit Support

Started 12/8/19 by ashleydiana2; 1430 views.
ashleydiana2

From: ashleydiana2

12/8/19

Hi all,

I made it nearly 3 months and then this weekend I was traveling by myself and I went on a complete tobacco bender...

I’m trying not be too hard on myself, but I’m so mad at all of the progress it feels like I just lost. This is the third time now that I made it about this long and have fallen back in. The other times I gradually had to become a full-on smoker again and had to go through the entire process of smoking for almost a year until I couldn’t stand it anymore and then quitting again. I don’t want it to get to that point... I hate myself as a smoker and smoking only makes me feel bad about myself. 

Can anyone relate to this? Any tips on how to stop the madness and break this exhausting cycle. I broke all of the remaining cigarettes in half and threw them in the trash, which is a start.

Thanks,

Ashley

Belinda2019

From: Belinda2019

12/8/19

Hey Ashley don’t be hard on yourself - it happens. 

I bet it tasted horrible, huh? And the stink on your hands - was it awesome, or was it bleccchhhh? And how about your hair and clothes - nice perfume, whadddya reckon? And the kicker....I bet you absolutely felt nothing whilst you were smoking; no aaahhhh, no relaxation, literally zip other than giddy, nauseous and disappointed?

That's because you’re actually no longer physically addicted to tobacco, it was the mental addiction talking to you - and boy, isn’t that voice strong?! All you’ve done is made yourself a bit stinky and given the sleeping nico demon a great big poke. So now, he’s going to try to get you to go there again.....

And this is where you have literally got to get back on that horse, and hang on for dear life....you’ve taken the first step by breaking them and throwing them out....

Start by pledging NOPE, on this forum every day, twice or three times or more if you have to

Get a journal / quit diary happening

And start by being nicer to yourself. You had a slip up, not a full on relapse. This is why they’re the ‘icky threes’....

When the nicodemon starts singing me it’s siren song, I literally visualise having a smoke, how it tasted and smelt...plus how I’ve always felt when I’ve succumbed to the ‘just one’....and it’s enough to keep me on the straight and narrow...

I hope you’re having a better day today - hugs

Hanevel

From: Hanevel

12/8/19

Oh, I absolutely relate.

I quit in 1992 and a few months after, I went to D.C. on business and bought a pack of cigs and smoked a few that night. Hated myself, as we do, which is self-defeating and pretty strange. Why on earth do we HATE ourselves? Good grief. I really think that that feeling is present in most serious smokers from the outset, part of why we smoke. 

Anyway, you did it. Climb back on the horse tomorrow, not Monday or Tuesday but tomorrow. Distract yourself and stop with the self hatred, already. The tobacco companies reeled us in. Not our fault. You can do it!

Brenda (1sept19)

From: Brenda (1sept19)

12/8/19

Hi Ashley,

   Many of us have been in the same place and have had multiple quits, only to relapse.  I think each quit teaches us something, so be kind to yourself and get back on your quit.  The only way to stop the madness is " just don't smoke ".  I learned that from an oldie here and it has been great advice.  relaxed

ashleydiana2

From: ashleydiana2

12/8/19

Dear Belinda,

Thanks for your words of support! You are right, it doesn’t help to be so hard on myself. Feeling better today.

Belinda2019

From: Belinda2019

12/8/19

You’re very welcome Ashley xx

Now just hop back on that horse, and keep going. Keep it as a slip, rather than a relapse, and you won’t need to worry about resetting your quit date. As you’ve said before, you really had to work hard at becoming a smoker again in the past, see if you can take the learning from that and use it to improve on your successful quit. As Brenda said above ‘Just Don’t Smoke’ - Yul Brynner made a series of stop smoking ads as he died from cancer, and that was how he ended them ‘Just Don’t Smoke’ (like Nike in reverse ‘Just Don’t It)......Start or take a pledge of NOPE for today....
We’re all here, rooting for you xxx

VIVSMOKEFREE

From: VIVSMOKEFREE

12/8/19

I can really relate to your story.      This time around I am 3 months quit and I feel confident.     I think the confidence has to be cultivated.  It is so easy to just have one ciggie, then one more,  then a few etc.......Just take it one day at a time and don't spend too much time beating yourself up.

I had many relapses but I think the most important thing is I always have come back to this forum.       It is good to read the stories of those who have gone before us.

We can all do it,    it is just that some of us have a few hiccups on the way.

I wish you confidence and stamina along your quitting journey.

Viv

Quit 24Aug2019.

Ovivi

From: Ovivi

12/8/19

You can do this! Remember how you take it one hour at a time in the beginning? Do everything and anything you can besides smoking. The feelings will pass when you don’t act on them. Get your reasons to not smoke out and remind yourself why you are doing this very hard but important thing. And keep posting! Good luck!

Hanevel

From: Hanevel

12/9/19

completely forgot about Yul Brynner's ads! Very powerful

One of my best friends and I smoked in precisely the same way. She quit six years ago using the e-cigs, and stopped using them a few yrs ago. Anyway, I texted her yesterday and said that I felt like smoking! And she texted me back that it would pass. Best advice ever about the cravings. Just let them pass. And they do...

Belinda2019

From: Belinda2019

12/9/19

They were, weren’t they? I was 13 that year, and 18 months later I’d started my dance with the (nico) demon....I think John Wayne and Steve McQueen died that year too....Wasn’t Steve McQueen only about 42? I was sad when he died - those amazing eyes!!

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