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I made my choice   Introductions/Newcomers Nook

Started Feb-23 by JDNope; 752 views.
JDNope

From: JDNope

Feb-23

Hi all. I've been perusing the threads today. I think it's really beautiful how supportive everyone is. Super encouraging to see a community of people going through the same thing and providing advice for one another.

I was a casual smoker in my 20s. A lot of times I didn't even buy them. I'd just bum or sneak them from roommates. But at some point in the last 10-12 years smoking became a 'solution' for anxiety. I would self-medicate with nicotine. This of course isn't a solution at all since nicotine causes anxiety rather than relieving it. But feeling anxious and reaching for a cigarette became hardwired in my brain unfortunately.

I am also pretty active - running, biking, working out, and hiking are all things I really enjoy and which add a lot of value to my life.

Last week I was at the doctor and he started telling me about the risks of respiratory problems from smoking. Suddenly everything hit me all at once. I realized that whether I knew it or not I'm making a choice between cigarettes and the active lifestyle I love. I CHOOSE THE ACTIVE LIFESTYLE. Currently 48 hours nicotine free.

  • Edited February 24, 2020 1:28 am  by  JDNope
In reply toRe: msg 1
Loreficent

From: Loreficent

Feb-24

Hi JD Nope,

This is my quit day too. Good to know we aren’t alone right? Honestly I’ve been reading on here a bit for about a month and I’ll say it kept me motivated to set a date. 
Ive got about 35 years smoking all together and I am now 58. Still a pretty young and active 58 and I I have a 17 year old daughter. She has BAD anxiety, which is managed pretty well now. We’ve been talking a lot about addiction, etc. She told me how she learned in DBT therapy to just lean in and ride the wave. It was more complex than that, but that is the gist. You sound very active and like you have lots of healthy outlets. Lean on those and lean in and ride. You will not regret it. Not sure how old you are, but DO NOT WAIT any longer to quit. No reason to! Lean on is here too. We have strength and support in numbers. This is a temporary phase, and in our minds we know that, right? 
looking forward to seeing you here tomorrow. Now, all you have to do is get through the day!

In reply toRe: msg 1
JerseyDee

From: JerseyDee

Feb-24

Hi there JD ... I read your post and thought I could have nearly written that myself .. started dabbling with cigarettes in college .. young .. and after some time it changed into a daily smoker, buying cigarettes, etc .. I, too, was reading through these threads yesterday and the encouragement here really awesome and beneficial to one trying to give this junk up.

And I, too, live an active lifestyle .. work out every morning .. and I love this sort of lifestyle.

What the catalyst for me was a client of a colleague wife just passed .. she was a smoker and developed COPD .. he said smoking is a slow suicide path and one way or the other it WILL catch up with . that really resonating with me .. so here I am 24 hrs quit .. with one minor slip up yesterday .. but today is a new day.

Good luck to you as you enter your third day!  We both CAN and WILL do this!!  

In reply toRe: msg 1
ModAndrea

From: ModAndrea

Feb-24

JDNope said:

I realized that whether I knew it or not I'm making a choice between cigarettes and the active lifestyle I love. I CHOOSE THE ACTIVE LIFESTYLE.

Welcome to the forum, JDNope, and congratulations on two days! If you haven't already, please join others quitting this month in our newest quit buddy group, February 2020 New Ex-Smokers

My best advice is to continue your reading. Here's a good place to start.

You're doing great, JDNope! I'm glad you're here. blush

Hugs,

Andrea

JDNope

From: JDNope

Feb-24

Hi Loreficent! Thank you for the encouragement. Nice to know I'm not alone. The 'lean in' methodology is interesting. I was googling around a bit on the subject after reading your post. It's crazy how intertwined cigarettes are with my response to anxiety! Exercise is definitely good for anxiety too, but you don't get that acute relief like cigarettes give you (which of course isn't relief at all but it does buzz all those receptors). Perhaps 'lean in' is something I could try. 

I hope you have  a great day Loreficent, and I love what you said about strength in numbers and how this is a temporary phase. Sometimes you just have to breathe and know that you won't always feel like this - trust that the moment will pass and there will be lots of much better moments to come!

JDNope

From: JDNope

Feb-24

Hi JerseyDee! Sounds like we are walking a similar path.  Just think how much further we will get with our workouts once we can breathe free! I ran a half marathon when I was younger. Maybe I'll do a full one next time!

That's really sad about your colleague's wife. I feel shame sometimes about how I've hurt myself but that's a trap too. I think we must let our inherent confidence and feeling of self worth always stay at the surface. Your minor slip up the other day is NOTHING compared to the willpower you know you have deep inside. Good luck today. You're going to do great!

JDNope

From: JDNope

Feb-24

Thank you so much, Andrea! I've been reading the articles and they are super helpful!

In reply toRe: msg 5
Loreficent

From: Loreficent

Feb-24

Hey JD!

Thank

you for the kind words. I think

we are all just floundering in the primordial soup of life together really, so yeah let’s swim through it together. Right now we are in some cloudy murky water but we will get through to clearer space. Just keep swimming. I so appreciate this space and knowing there are others out there I can connect with. This morning has been interesting. I’m really tired and ready for a nap. I had a pretty anxious moment an hour ago. Got on and just started reading articles. It really did strengthen my resolve.

anyway... so happy to have this space to be right now on here!

thank you for being there!

JDNope

From: JDNope

Feb-24

Hey Loreficent! Yes, we are all just new souls trying to figure out how to live this life and making all the mistakes along the way, and that is totally okay! 

I've always really loved this poem: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/95085-i-walk-down-the-street-there-is-a-deep-hole

I'm glad you got on here when you felt anxious and read some things. I've been trying to rotate between physical activity, reading inspiring things on here, and diving into my work.

I'm at work right now and was just thinking if I were to go outside to smoke right now what would it solve? It would all be over in 4 minutes, I'd smell disgusting, and come slinking back into my office looking guilty. And I'd just want to do it all over again in an hour. 

Also I feel like crying every half hour or so. Haha. I think a lot of emotions are coming to the surface. 

Have a great day. You are doing great and you have everything you need.

JerseyDee

From: JerseyDee

Feb-24

Hello there.  Thanks for the words of encouragement ... I feel I am going to get passed this .. I have been popping nicorette gum today and it is really helping to take away the urge to smoke .. however, I am fatigued .. I suppose a side effect to quitting .. are you going through any sort of physical changes as well?  I am beat .. I mean really beat and head foggy.

That is great that your ran a half marathon .. I never did that but ran plenty of 5K's throughout my life ..

I tried to keep my smoking as much of a secret as possible among other people, particularly people at the gym .. it is amazing that we can do so much athletically while we put that junk into our bodies .. junk in, junk out .. it was like my dirty little secret .. and dirty it IS! ... how gross is the concept of this ugly addiction?  Embarrassing and shameful.

I feel good that I have made contact with you and let's try to keep each other on track!  We do seem to be walking a similar path and it feels good that someone understands .. you WILL run that full marathon by next year .. keep positive .. kick the junk and you will be able to get through a marathon .. I am 49 yrs old now and due to some other injuries no longer run so no longer have that sort of aspiration .. but I do yoga every morning and take a water aerobics class (better on the joints) right after yoga as well ...

But I do remember my days of running very well .. again .. unreal that we could do that while we were also polluting our lungs : (  .. Stay the course!  And please keep me motivated and I will do the same for you.  - Dee

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