Hi there,

In the grand scheme of things, smoking for as long as we did and training and feeding the addict within like we have, several months or a year even really isn’t that long. I’ve smoked for a total of 35+ years. Quit when I was pregnant and that lasted a couple years. Now, to be at 2 and a half months quit is so empowering!! 
Don’t analyze it too much, just keep doing it. Distract yourself. Walk. Drink water. Sleep. So many things to do! You are a good writer. Entertain us!  Entertain YOU! Start a Journal here under the journal tab. There are several there that are pretty entertaining! 
Im 58, and realized I am really too young to keep smoking! Really. I’m very busy and active and smoking is a big monkey on my back that I’m sick of carrying around. It embarrassed me, made me feel ashamed, made me feel a hypocrite...could go on and on. 
Waves and craves pass. They really do. And they get better past the first few weeks!! Most all people here say that. They aren’t gone, but definitely better. 
I failed several times at cold turkey, but didn’t stop quitting and have found the patch and being here are the right combination for me.

Don’t worry about any of your posts scaring anyone. There is such a tremendous amount of acceptance and support here. Everyone here “gets it”. We all are going through it. Some have more time than others and that is a beautiful thing as they jump in and remind us we will get through it. 
Read through some of the other months from the beginning! You will feel right at home anywhere on this forum I’m sure.

Read in the Library on the bottom left tab too.

Just don’t smoke. You will just end up wishing you were where you are now. Just one really does not work. 

It is hard in the beginning, but didn’t mean to scare you! It DOES GET BETTER! I feel better even at 3 months, my skin is better, the bags under my eyes have diminished immensely! I actually have more energy and time. Not thinking of when I can fit a cigarette in my day. One thing has changed is my sleep pattern. Sleeping more soundly and my schedule is completely off. But also may be due to not working right now, due to the pandemic. 
Believe me things do get better...... financially too, I wouldn’t be looking for a new vehicle if that wasn’t a factor. I also want to get the new car for many reasons but one is if I do and have a car payment and insurance goes up, I definitely won’t be able to afford smoking. Which will make myself accountable for not smoking and financially keeping me from not enjoying life. Don’t like living paycheck to paycheck. Done it! Not fun. anyway really hope I didn’t scare you off of a really good thing you are doing. Health reasons are another factor. I use an inhaler because of asthma, yep still smoked, but noticed not using as often! 
 

Hey thanks Loreficent - is that your real name by the way?

I was just about to describe a craving I had this afternoon, which was pretty horrendous, but I think I will take your advice and stop over-analysing my feelings. I will try to indeed go with things, like you say, and will start reading some of what is on here...

Yeah, and I absolutely get the embarrassed bit you mention. I have 3 young kids and I was forever being a child by finding a way to get away from them and squeeze in a cig, which doesn't fit in too great with the adult, responsible persona that I mostly try to portray to them.

Ah don't worry Eve, you didn't scare me. Was just surprised to read the cravings continue for so long. I'm a little naive about what lies ahead currently, but will read up.

And thanks for being concerned enough to unscare me 

Ha! I wish that were my name...It is a nickname bestowed on me by my friends who see me as formidable with certain things, so I thought, ok, I can be that with smoking.

Name is Lori. Your turn now....

Wow, you should write a book.  Your descriptions are phenomenal.  I also quite cold turkey, just over 4 months ago.  I didn't experience anything like you did.  Gosh, I don't think I would have made it if I had.     

I can't imagine what your 3rd and 4th month will be like but I hope you write about it. 

Cheers! 

Hi Debra

Thanks for saying that, everyone is lovely here. It's no wonder this place works.

Glad your quitting was less painful than mine. I think I'm just a big baby though, and my body didn't respond too kindly to the fact that I was depriving it of something it never intended to be deprived of, right to the day it planned to killed me.

Hi Lori, nice name 

I am Shak. I started using Musivore on another website, where it was more important to be anonymous. But I have grown to like the name and possibly the anonymity, so feel free to use either.

Anyways, nice to meet you. You all do such a great job on here, but I have been looking around and you truly are one of the real proficient, knowledgeable, helpful and straight-talking stars on here

Hi Shak,

Well nice to meet you too! I like Musivore too.

Thanks for the compliment. 
 

Where are you? I think in the UK? 
 

So, as far as kids...long story, but I had my daughter at 42, and she is awesome. Keeps me young for sure! I also have a stepson who is now 25. My daughter’s dad was married before me and we had gotten together when my stepson was near 4. He and I split up when my daughter was also about 4. I’m really close still with my stepson. His dad was a smoker when we got together, but a doctor and quite ashamed of smoking. He insisted we hide it from his son (Adam). So I went along with it. I initially hid it from my daughter too. Well, anyway, that doesn’t work. In hindsight I never should have tried it, but hindsight is always 20/20, yes? So when Adam was about 12, I came out of the closet as I knew he suspected and I was increasingly uncomfortable attempting to “hide it”. Adam was most angry with my dishonesty. It upset him about the smoking but it was the dishonesty that most bothered him. I learned a lot from that! His dad insisted still on not being honest and Adam and I both learned a lot from that!

I say this because you mentioned 3 young children. My advice would be to be very honest with them about smoking and let them learn from you about addiction and the struggle to be free from it. I talk much with both my kids about it and I really know that neither will ever smoke.

Are you their dad or mom? Either way... make better choices than I did initially with talking with them about it. There really is no way to hide smoking except from other smokers. 

You make it good or bad - hard or easy, its all in your mind.  Have you read Allan Carr's Easy Way to Quite Smoking.   Here is link to download.

http://prdupl02.ynet.co.il/ForumFiles_2/15119301.pdf

I found this book to be very helpful with the psychological aspect of quitting smoking.