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108 Days - There's Hope For Everyone   Quit Support

Started Jan-14 by StruggleHard; 771 views.
StruggleHard

From: StruggleHard

Jan-14

Hi - I've been offline for awhile but wanted to pop back on to say to all the newbies that if I could make it 108 days, anything is possible.  I am the worst quitter - I still feel like I'm missing out, and as though I will lament the loss of the cigs forever, even though I know they're not my friend and I didn't 'give up' anything good.  In my mind, I don't think of myself as an ex-smoker yet, and I know that's dangerous.  Yet, somehow, I haven't had a drag in 108 days.  I had even lost count of how many days it was, which I guess is a good sign.  I don't think obsessively about cigarettes every minute of the day anymore, still more than I care to, but there are stretches where I don't think about them at all and I never thought that was possible,

I share this not to be self-deprecating, but to hopefully lend hope to someone who thinks they'll never make it past where they are.  I am not all positive and rah-rah, I'm not particularly strong-willed or tough, but I've not smoked in 108 days -  cold-turkey.  Incidentally, if I could hit rewind, I would not do it cold-turkey.  For me, I think I made it much harder than it needed to be and I realized it at the time, but didn't want to start smoking to wean off, or use quit aids, after I'd past what I thought were the worst few days in the beginning.  If I'd known how long the 'worst' days REALLY would be, I would have used a method of assistance for sure.  The depression I sunk into was epic, and there had to have been an easier way (to be fair, other contributing factors in the sadness).  

If you're a Princess Bride fan, you'll remember that every night the Dread Pirate Roberts said,  "Goodnight Westley", I'll most likely kill you in the morning",  and that went on for 5 years.  I liken my quit attitude to that...Pretty much everyday for 2+ months I'd say to myself, "Well, today is the day I crack and smoke.  It's too hard and I can't do it; I'm not strong enough.", Yet somehow at the end of the day I still hadn't smoked.  So the whole one day (hour/minute) at a time thing sounds so trite, but there's definitely something to it.  I was counting not smoked time in hours initially, that's how miserable I was.  My screen name is no lie.  I just hope I can keep somehow making it to the end of the day smoke free and hope that someday the desire and urges will stay away for good.

So, to those that are struggling, that think they can never make it, that they will never be in that happy place that so many successful quitters are after time, I want to say there's hope.  You don't even have to be happy about not smoking, you just have to not smoke each day.  It does get better, it really does.  And I have to believe it continues to get better even from here.

Ironically, today I am having the strongest cravings I've had in a few weeks, and I'm not sure why.  But they'll pass, I know they'll pass.

Good luck to everyone and congrats to all who have made it!

Eve1973

From: Eve1973

Jan-14

Hey strugg! Over 90 days is fantastic! You are doing it. Everything you said I can resonate with, except I did not think every day I would smoke the next. I did get the Princess Bride reference. 
 

That thinking may set you up for a fail then. Hope not, but I would plan on how to celebrate when you reach a milestone! That was my thinking! Be more positive when you go to sleep, be like Nicodemon you failed today.....I plan on beating you tomorrow too, but throw it at me. As a good friend on here said ......bob and weave, bob and weave and the POW you hit him away from you! 
 

Either way you are doing great......keep going it will get easier for you. 

gkim

From: gkim

Jan-14

I love this post. Thank you for the matter of fact message and your honesty. I still haven’t let go of my romanticism of smoking but now I also see the realities of what smoking does to my body. I have 71 days today!

Nope62

From: Nope62

Jan-14

     I agree, You are doing Great!

Give yourself some credit! You are doing it, the one thing you thought you couldn't do. Everyday you don't smoke you win!

You are right about the cravings, they will pass and at some point your mind will get it'self in sync with what you want!

 Take Care!

  • Edited January 15, 2021 1:00 am  by  Nope62
StruggleHard

From: StruggleHard

Jan-14

Love the bob and weave! One thing that got me through the worst of the angry moods was beating on a punching bad quite a bit! I highly recommend. Craving? Get punching.

In reply toRe: msg 3
StruggleHard

From: StruggleHard

Jan-14

Thanks and congrats back to you gkim! 71 days is no joke either. I'm not romanticizing the cigs, I k ow they're evil. My mom died of lung cancer, and my Dad is fighting it now.. 32 years after quitting. I'm just that much of an addict that I still wanted/want to smoke. I don't really, I don't want to get cancer, but the addiction was still there. 

In reply toRe: msg 4
StruggleHard

From: StruggleHard

Jan-14

Thanks, Nope! I'm going to keep at it! 

In reply toRe: msg 3
Nope62

From: Nope62

Jan-15

 71 days quit is amazing!  Good work!

I also still romanticize cigarettes.  I hate them for what they have done to my health. They are nasty!  But I am sitting here wishing I had one. It's like I've lost my best friend!  All I can say is that it's classic junkie thinking on our part.

Take Care!

In reply toRe: msg 8
overdoze

From: overdoze

Jan-24

Hi there i feel you on romanticizing cigarettes, i have had that feeling before and its annoying to want to quit and then have those thoughts. Thankfully this time it hasn't happened well at least yet, except one night about a week ago i was at a bar and had a couple drinks and out of nowhere i wanted a cig, just like that and craving was so intense im like im gonna smoke, thankfully no-one smoked where i was at, but alcohol is a big trigger for me, thats how i lost a 2 year quit before, so keeping my guard up with that. 

Overdoz quit 01-04-2021

gkim

From: gkim

Jan-24

In my head some things go go hand in hand so the first week or so I had to give to coffee. It was such a trigger for me. Maybe hold off drinking alcohol until you’re stronger?

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