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Feel like giving up   Quit Support

Started Nov-13 by Elyna3; 1853 views.
Elyna3

From: Elyna3

Nov-13

Hi,

I am new here but I just really needed to talk to someone.

I have smoked for 20 years and have tried quitting many times. This last time I was fine for two years, and then because of some bad news I gradually started smoking again last March or April. Then I quit many times over the summer and I recently had two months smoke-free before I smoked a few packs again last week.

I live with my alcoholic father and I just found out that he is going to the store tomorrow to buy liquor. He has been somewhat successful in quitting alcohol, but now he'll be drunk everyday again. 

It makes it so difficult for me to be able to focus on the good things in my life when I live with an active alcoholic. I don't drink alcohol. 

So now I am thinking that I might as well smoke when nothing else is going right. He also smokes inside, and it's very easy to have a slip when the cigarettes are right there. 

I was supposed to start a quit smoking class on Thursday but it has been postponed till after Christmas.

It just seems like nothing is going right and it makes it really difficult not to smoke. 

But I really don't want to smoke. I took the money I was using for cigarettes and started taking piano lessons. I cannot afford both, and the piano is a very good motivator. But even playing the piano will be difficult with him drunk everyday, so I don't know. 

I just needed to vent to someone.

Thanks 

In reply toRe: msg 1
Jerthie123

From: Jerthie123

Nov-13

Hey Elyna. Sorry to hear you are having such a difficult time. I understand. I cannot imagine the difficulty you are experiencing. I am praying for you! Take your journey one step at a time. Great you are motivated to do sonething so positive like take piano lessons. Stay on this forum for encouragement and support. We are all here to listen to each other and offer support without any judgement. I do not smoke but I use nicotine lozenges, and I have been using them for 9 years now. I know the feeling of addiction. I wish I could make things better for you, but just know that your reaching out on this forum is a very positive step forward in the right direction. There are articles that can educate you on smoking cessation here as well. Congratulations on at least knowing that you want to quit! That is positive! Good for you!!

Elyna3

From: Elyna3

Nov-13

Thank you so much. The overwhelming feeling passed after writing here so I was able to not have a slip this time.

I use nicotine patch and chewing gum. It helps so much.

Thank you.

In reply toRe: msg 3
Jerthie123

From: Jerthie123

Nov-14

You are welcome. Keep on doing what you are doing with the patch and the gum. Good work. Take it one day at a time. And post here as often as you can. Read other people's stories of how they beat nicotine addiction. It will inspire you. And know that you are not alone in your struggles. Keep on keeping on!!

In reply toRe: msg 1
turtles

From: turtles

Nov-15

I know it feels so overwhelming…living with an alcoholic is draining, frustrating and just plain sad. As I sit here, my daughter, 37, is in the ICU in Florida. She has been drinking vodka for several years. I finally wound her around to wanting to go to rehab. Upon entrance a week ago, they moved her to hospital, then ICU, with intubation,ventilator and sedation medication as her DT’s and hallucinations are so very bad. She is is still in that state a week later. She also already has cirrhosis.  We’re praying. 
I quit smoking almost 4 years ago. I hated it by then, quit then picked up one (big mistake) so on April 1 to not be a fool anymore I quit cold turkey, no patch..no chantix..nothing. For a month it was rough..lot of sugar free candy, sucking on a straw etc. But there was a goal in sight, to not be a slave anymore. After 3 months I started not thinking about them as much.

Your father being an alcoholic shouldn’t resign you to dying early from COPD or emphysema.

I don’t know how old you are, but tough love is eventually what’s called for, for the alcoholic to make themselves better. But your smoking you can control, just have to be tough.

I’ll reply again with a page of sayings I read through every time I had a craving. They only last about 45 sec, and decrease with time.
Good luck! Rooting for you!

In reply toRe: msg 1
turtles

From: turtles

Nov-15

If this helps at all, yay! Hard to express how wonderful the light is at the end of the addiction tunnel. I never think of smoking, don’t notice when someone else does except they smell horrible lol. Besides eating a lot of sugar free candy and gum, every time I had a craving I read this list. Usually by the end the craving had passed and distraction worked. Hope it helps you..

If I have just one I will be right back where I started; and where I started was desperately wishing I could be where I am today".

In the beginning of the quit the voice of addiction screams loudly and incessantly and then as the days, weeks and months pass it changes tactics and gently seductively says of course you can have just one". Don't fall for it ever again. 

One leads to thousands more!

I'll stay quit cause I never want to go through this again. 

DON'T EVER LOOK BACK.   YOU'RE NOT GOING THAT WAY

you only have to do one thing to quit......just don't smoke!

It always seems impossible until it's done.

If you don't take care of your body, where are you going to live?

I'm not exhausted like I used to be but I have come to realize that I smoked anytime I didn't know what to do

...[Message truncated]
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Elyna3

From: Elyna3

Nov-16

Thank you for your post. I am so sorry to hear about your daughter and I can't imagine what you are going through. 

My father is not so sick as your daughter, he is still in ok health luckily despite drinking his entire adult life. 

You are so right in saying that I should not accept letting myself die early of smoke related diseases if I can avoid it, just because he drinks alcohol. I must find the strength. 

Thank you for the other post you posted. The next time I start thinking about having a cigarette I will re-read it. It is so true that living smoke free like I do now is all that I desire when I smoke. So I must be strong.

I sincerely wish you all the best in this very difficult situation.

In reply toRe: msg 7

Hi Elyna and welcome!  I have many drinkers in my family and even if his health is good now, it will probably catch up with him one day.  We can't continue to abuse our bodies like that without having some kind of adverse affect.  It didn't catch up to my father until he was about 70 years old.  And the sad thing is he has aged like 10 years in the last 2 years.  He doesn't drink anymore but now it is just too late and he is suffering for it.

My husband is both a drinker and a smoker.  I'm not sure why I still put up with it but I do.  Him smoking and telling me I could never quit was one of my biggest motivators to quit almost 5 years ago.  Believe it or not, it doesn't even bother me anymore.  But his smoking and drinking will definitely catch up to him one day too.  

Stay strong... you can do this and do it for yourself!

June2019

From: June2019

Nov-16

thank you, Turtles! you quit a few months before me back in 2019 i think (no puffs here since 6/6/2019).

I LOVE your strength and needed to see your message today because i have been craving a puff on and off since the summer, and just before i logged in today - not good! Scary how these bloody cravings sneak up on me lately after 2 plus years of no craving.

Praying for your daughter

hugs-

June2019

turtles

From: turtles

Nov-16

I have been lucky, with 3 1/2 years under out belts I have not had one craving for a cigarette in over 2 years.maybe because it was so very hard cold turkey I have never looked back. I’m sorry you still have to fight it. 

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