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Help   Quit Support

Started Nov-20 by mbburns1971; 990 views.
mbburns1971

From: mbburns1971

Nov-20

I'm a new member. Hi everyone.  It's taken me quite a while to join a group like this.  I guess I haven't been ready or wanting to quit. But I'm scared.  They are slowly killing me. But every time I think about it and I'm stressed I pick up a cigarette. I am in a daily prison. I have health issues which are extremely depressing and stressful. I'm not ashamed to say that cigarettes are one of the things I depend on for that stress and depression. But I can't seem to stop. I think I have been trying to kill myself slowly. So I know I absolutely have to quit but on the other hand I'm afraid to live without them. Anybody else have the same experience? I could really use some support thanks.

JavaNY

From: JavaNY

Nov-20

Hi and welcome. Start by reading the November 2022 Ex-Smokers under the Introductions/Newcomers Nook. There's lots of good information. Some people prefer to quit cold turkey and others with some type of nicotine replacement. Read about them and decide how you want to start your quit. Most smokers feel the same way you do. It's hard to imagine not smoking because we've been doing it for so long and we are addicted. But it does not help stress. If you have not read Allen Carr's 'Easy Way to Stop Smoking', I think it is worth reading.  Nothing is easy that is worthwhile, but if you want to quit, you can.

Paul

Jerthie123

From: Jerthie123

Nov-20

Hello... You have come to a good place! A really good place for helping you want to quit smoking. Like Paul mentioned, I suggest you read Allen Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking. It has helped out thousands of people, maybe even more. You are not alone. I smoked for 20 years, then quit with the help of using nicotine lozenges. Sad part of my story is I got addicted to the lozenges and have been using them now for 9 years. You can read about my story in the November Ex- Smokers chat. You have made a good start just by reaching out, which shows that you want to quit! Remember that. You made a decision to come to this group. So that is something you tell yourself. For this small step, be proud! Then take it one day at a time and again like Paul said, find the quit method that is right for you. God bless us all!

Hi Mbburns and welcome!  You have already received some excellent advice from JavaNY and Jerthie.  We are here for each other and there is absolutely no judgement here.  Yes, we have probably experienced most things you are feeling.  Me myself, smoked for over 35 years and really didn't even want to quit.  It was my escape...my friend...my reward...my relaxation...my anti-depressant.  I really thought I depended on it for a stress relief but I learned through this forum and through the articles and everything that I read that it was just false...and when I say false, I mean a TOTAL LIE!  All I can say to you is read, read, read... join in on the November 2022 discussion and read those articles and post to your quit buddies that are most likely feeling the same things and going through the same cravings.  It is HARD .... but you can over come this.  Find your motivation and go with it.  No joke, I probably quit almost 10 times before I found the thing that pulled me through.  My "thing" was getting angry and realizing I was an addict and treated it just like that.  Also, understanding the brain the the physical receptors that shut down during your quit process.

Everyone needs to find what they need to do that works for them.  It's not so different than losing weight and exercising.  What motivates one person does nothing for another.  You need to find what works for YOU.  All I know is you can do this!  And we are here for you!

xvaper

From: xvaper

Dec-4

Most certainly I had the same experience.

I also was 'depending' on cigarettes for stress and depression, and I was also afraid of life without them.

There is information here and links to more information that I highly recommend you read. The good news here that you are here with fellow addicts ( actively smoking or not) that are here to support you all the way with no judgment.

The seemingly aware thoughts you have about using cigarettes to cope with depression and the fear of life without are classic. The reason they are typical is not because every smoker's life circumstances are similar or because they have the same personality. Quite the opposite. Smokers of all ages, nationalities and life circumstances experience the exact thoughts you are describing  They do, because that's what nicotine addiction does to your brain, neurologically and in turn psychologically. Understanding this can free you. It's not you. It's the addiction to a chemical known as nicotine, that cleverly mimics the molecules that activate the neuropaths in the brain parts that are responsible for learning survival skills. Your brain will use any psychological tool it has to protect this supply of what it has come to 'view' as essential to survival as water and food. That's the short version of the science bit. You are no alone. We can help you with information and encouragement whenever you need it. 

In reply toRe: msg 5
Jerthie123

From: Jerthie123

Dec-5

I needed to hear this. I am still struggling to get off of nicotine, while consuming 6 lozenges a day. I have been feeling super duper anxious lately. I know exactly when my lozenge feeding is. I begin to plan all of the tasks in my day in accordance with my next feeding. The feeding does not even last but for a minute. I no longer suck on lozenges for half an hour. I want to quit so badly that I only allow myself to suck for one minute. I don't even think I am getting any nicotine to my brain to be honest, but I am a slave to the thought that I will get relief from my anxiety by popping one in my mouth. 

Today was horrible. I was so anxious I forgot to turn off my car. The engine was left running for more than an hour! I discovered that my headlights were on an hour and a half after getting home. I went outside to see that my car had been running the whole time. Before discovering this, I was cleaning my house like a madman, talking out loud, worried about any and everything. I so badly at that point wanted to pop a lozenge to give myself the relief of knowing I had one. But I decided to wait until 4pm and stick to my now 6 a day instead of 12! So at least I did not give in to the lozenge at 2:30pm, but up until 4pm I was anxious out of my mind anxious!!! It was horrible. Then I started to cry! 

I think I am doing better than 12 lozenges a day, niw at 6, sometimes only 5 or even 4, but I think today is a sign that I am not even satisfied at being at 6 and an admittance to myself that I am still a hardcore nicotine addict- whether it is through cigarettes, lozenges- I am still a slave to nicotine. That is the bottom line, sadly.

I want to write more but I have a few things I want to get done. They don't need to get done right away, but the craving for nicotine makes every little thing feel so urgent! I am still a slave. Only 6 a day now and only sucking on each one for a minute or less, is still making me crazy. Any suggestions out here? I appreciate you all so much!

xvaper

From: xvaper

Dec-5

Hi Jerthie!

I think you are doing the best you can. However, reading your posts and knowing facts about addiction in general and Nicotine in particular, I can see that you are torturing yourself, and it's not doing you any good... By going down from 12 to 5 you have made Nicotine occupy your whole being, raising your anxiousness to a peak level, and made yourself distraught. In my opinion, and experts in the field, cutting down is not really a way forward. You will feel no more anxiety if you quit altogether than you do now between lozenges. You say you don't even think you're getting much nicotine at all since you don't keep it in very long, and if that's the case, why not take it one step further? You have A LOT of will power. You managed to go down from 12 to 5 a day even though it is pure torture, and you have endured it for some time now. That amazing willpower you have will get you through a quit, which I promise you would be no worse, or even easier than what you are doing to yourself right now. You have the knowledge now. You have read and understand how this addiction works. You have the non judgmental support from many people on here. You have the willpower. You can do this.

In reply toRe: msg 7
Anne2020

From: Anne2020

Dec-6

Consider taking the plunge - Quit the nicotine. 

You have proven to yourself you do not need it and that you have the will power to control yourself.  What are you waiting for?  Just stop. 

You will immediately know gratification for taking decisive action regarding your well being and you can build on that day to day.  Instead of fighting with yourself to keep your intake down, give yourself a pat on the back for refusing to let little lozenges rule your life.    

You be are in control of you.  

CC to Jerthie123
Jerthie123

From: Jerthie123

Dec-6

Thank you Anne. Thanks Xvaper. I will keep you all posted. Thank you!

MarthaJC

From: MarthaJC

Dec-7

Hi Jerthie - I just have to echo the comments of xvaper and Anne!  Also, I know how debilitating anxiety can be, and I know that your mind tells you that lozenges are a coping tool. I truly hope you can let go of that idea. It's false, and it's harmful. On the other side of your fear is freedom! Sending you a virtual hug:)

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