Confused malcontents swilling Chardonnay while awaiting the Zombie Apocalypse.
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Okay, I hope this works...
The delightfully relaxing sound of a very grumpy(Sarcophilus harrisii)
Don't think the sound file loaded.
It's so funny.
Run a competition asking Sydney to name a new ferry, expect the outright silliest name to win.
Ferry McFerryface is now officially the name of the last ferry in a new fleet of inner harbour vessels.
The name was voted on by hundreds of Sydneysiders in a competition which allowed the public to be part of maritime history.
However, the most votes actually went to the name Boaty McBoatface, the notable title Brits voted to call a new research vessel last year.
But Minister for Transport and Infrastructure Andrew Constance said they wanted to avoid a double up.
"Given Boaty was already taken by another vessel, we've gone with the next most popular name nominated by Sydneysiders," Mr Constance said.
"Ferry McFerryface will be the harbour's newest icon, and I hope it brings a smile to the faces of visitors and locals alike.
You have just been bitten by a small snake. You are pretty certain it is just a harmless python, but it disappeared before you could get a proper look. Do you administer first aid and go to the hospital or keep gardening?
When Pat Ryan saw a little brown-looking snake disappear under his fence earlier this month, he decided to check himself over, even though he had not felt a bite.
He had been gardening barefoot in his yard in Agnes Water on the Queensland coast about an hour north of Bundaberg.
"[My wife] washed my foot off to have a look … then washed it a bit more and said, 'Yeah I can see two little strike marks'," Mr Ryan said.
Like in many of the 3,000 or so reported snake bites in Australia each year, there are a number of snakes fitting Mr Ryan's description that are native to the region, some harmless and others potentially deadly.
If Mr Ryan had been bitten by a brown tree snake, over the next few hours he might experience some very mild local irritation around the bite and its weak neurotoxic venom might cause some nausea.
But if the snake was a similar-looking eastern brown, a deadly cocktail of neurotoxins, myotoxins, and coagulants would be making its way toward his bloodstream before attacking his nervous system and muscles, putting him at high risk of cardiac arrest.
This is where treatment is crucial. If the right procedure is followed, the snake venom can be all but stopped before it reaches the blood, according to toxicology expert Dr Brian Fry.
"When you wipe out when you're running or something like that and you scrape your knee and you get that clear liquid coming out, that's actually lymphatic fluid," Dr Fry said.
"Lymphatic fluid is fluid around our blood vessels, bathing everything that's not inside the blood vessels.
That's right, one one the funny skits!
We don't get SNL over here.
What channel is it on? Because CBS plan to buy one of our TV stations - be great if we got something other than more Big Bang repeats.
Scientists have published details of the world's biggest dinosaur footprints, found in Western Australia, with the sauropod prints measuring a whopping 1.7 metres.
They top a dinosaur footprint found in the Mongolian desert, reported last year, that measured 106cm.
The scientific description of the 1.7-metre footprints has been published by University of Queensland vertebrate palaeontologist Steve Salisbury, in the Memoir of the Society of Vertebrate Paleontology, after a two- to three-year peer review process.
The footprints were found on the north-western coast of Western Australia, where Dr Salisbury's research project has revealed the journeys of dinosaurs up and down the coast.
"We've got several tracks up in that area that are about 1.7 metres long," Dr Salisbury said.
"So most people would be able to fit inside tracks that big, and they indicate animals that are probably around 5.3 to 5.5 metres at the hip, which is enormous."
The dinosaur that left the prints on what is now sandstone rock platforms, on a remote coastline north of Broome, was the largest member of the sauropods, which includes well-known dinosaurs such as the brontosaurus.
"At first it would seem a footprint that size and an animal that big, is it scientifically possible?" Dr Salisbury said.
"These animals did exist. They were out there and we're seeing evidence of them having existed in the Kimberley 130 million years ago based on these tracks."