Confused malcontents swilling Chardonnay while awaiting the Zombie Apocalypse.
Questions with no apparent answers:
. Which letter is silent in the word "Scent," the S or the C?
Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?
. Why is the letter W in English called double U? Shouldn't it be called double V?
.. Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.
100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.
Four great confusions still unresolved.
1 At a movie theater, which arm rest is yours?
2. If people evolve from monkeys, why are monkeys still around?
3. Why is there a 'D' in fridge, but not in refrigerator?
Those are great!
Words of Wisdom?
THE NEW ME
I used to think I was just a regular person, but I was born white, which
now, whether I like it or not, makes me a racist.
I am a fiscal and moral conservative, which by today's standards, makes me a fascist.
I am heterosexual, which now makes me a homophobe.
I am mostly non-union, which makes me a traitor to the working class and an ally of big business.
I am retired, which makes me useless.
I think and I reason, therefore I doubt much that the mainstream media
tells me, which must make me a reactionary.
I am proud of my heritage, which makes me a xenophobe.
I value my safety and that of my family, I do not have guns but I appreciate the
police and the legal system, which makes me a right-wing extremist.
I believe in hard work, fair play, and fair compensation according to
each individual's merits, which today makes me an anti-socialist.
I believe in the defense and protection of my country and I
honor those who served in the Armed Forces, which now makes me a right wing-militant.
Please help me come to terms with the new me because I'm just not sure who I am anymore!
Funny that it's all just taken place over the last 7 or 8 years!
As if all of this nonsense wasn’t enough to deal with, now I’m not even sure which toilet to use!
Not even I could rephrase it better.