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LifeRing Recovery

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LifeRing Recovery: a self-help alternative for recovery from alcoholism and other chemical dependency. Group support for abstinence from alcohol and “drugs” by empowering the sober self within you. Completely secular: no prayers, Higher Powers or Steps.

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Meetingless Musings   Sobriety/Recovery Journals

Started Mar-29 by 2stickponies; 239 views.
2stickponies

From: 2stickponies

Mar-29

I've been clean and sober a little over 2 years now. I find this is putting my image of time in an odd light. 2 years without a drink or a cigarette? Really?

I've quit other abuses in the past, but this time it's different. "Yeah, I used to snort drugs" is a might lot different for me than saying "I don't drink any more."  Alcohol and cigarettes were my pals since 15. Forty years later, I dropped 'em both cold.

My husband says he liked the drunk me, but he likes the sober me, too. I feel the same. There are moments when wistful memories tickle my resolve. But I am a stubborn old pony and continue plodding along the recovery road. It's a slower lane. Less creative and frankly, a little less lively, but here I am. I suppose I had to grown up at some point.

2 years. Really? And what has happened since I left my first destructive love? Lessee.

  • A ringing phone no longer frightens me, but remains wholly annoying.
  • I don't scramble around looking for misplaced paychecks.
  • I don't cringe when I wake up alone in bed.
  • My friends don't tell me I was making out at the bar with John Alcatraz when they know I know I never did. Nice guy, though.
  • Oh! No more drunk texting! Man -- Glad to toss that right into the rubbish bin. (But boy, did I think I was clever spreading horse manure all over the still, dark night,)

Not bad for two years' work. How are you holding up?

Brian (BrianB125)

From: Brian (BrianB125)

Mar-31

Welcome to the forum 2stick, two years is great.  And yes, there is a lot less drama in the nondrinking life, and it's a welcome change.  Keep letting us know how you're doing.

Brian

MaryLouise3

From: MaryLouise3

Apr-9

Two years  sounds good and I know what you mean about the ringing phone! One way I think about long-term sobriety is that the unbuzzed life is another kind of daily routine. I do many of the things I used to do but without using alcohol to cope to numb the feelings. I do many things I didn't have time for when I was drinking. Remember the endings of films, read in bed, have perfect recall of parties (if we ever get to have them again) and that whole shameful layer of saying or doing things I wouldn't have said or done sober has gone.

Looking back on 14 years is like peering down the telescope -- I'm not that person any more. There's still a heightened vulnerability because I could go back there or find myself back there and  have to go through the struggle to get sober all over again. But there's no interest in testing the waters or  taking risks. My life now isn't perfect at all and right now stressed by Covid fears and restrictions, but it works for me.

Good to see you here.

ML

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