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Formerly known as the About.com Smoking Cessation support forum, this community is open to all who are recovering from nicotine addiction.

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February 2021 Ex-Smokers - Start Here!   Quit Buddies Unite

Started 1/31/21 by Terry (abquitsmking); 35214 views.
Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

3/13/21

Thanks Anthony - things seem a lot better today, thank goodness.  I WILL stay away from those cigarettes.

Hope you have a great smoke-free day.

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

3/13/21

I'm going to have to make more space on my wall relaxed - "Would you rather smoke or breathe?" is a great one to focus the mind on why we're doing this.

I'm sorry to hear that you're not feeling the freedom yet, but it WILL come.   Everyone says so (and I remember glimpses of it myself, before I threw my quits away so stupidly).  

And in the meantime, ten weeks of not poisoning yourself is amazing - whatever the state of your health, it's better than it would be if you hadn't quit.  

You take care too.  

KatieKat84

From: KatieKat84

3/13/21

Hi Suzy,

Thanks for your messages. And please feel free to obsess about your quit until the cows come home! Not that you do, but honestly whatever it takes to keep that quit going. It is all about YOUUUU! :)

I’m sorry you had a hard time sleeping and were worrying about your son - what are your worries, if you can share? Don’t worry that you feel you would have smoked if you could get the tobacco. The only thing that matters is you DIDN’T smoke and got through the day. Some days it really is about ‘hanging on’, just somehow getting through that day. How was it today?
 

Are there other things you find helpful to relieve stress?

 
I’m sorry to hear about your falling out with your sister. That sounds very painful and so difficult to find a way through. I totally know the feeling too. I’m realising with my sister that we’ve never found a way to argue/disagree constructively - it’s always so upsetting and recriminative. It’s amazing how family can press our buttons isn’t it... I’m sorry your parents aren’t alive anymore and you think this would make them sad. But in the end we all have to live our lives and be true to ourselves. Hopefully we can both find a way to relate to our sisters again in time.

Re teaching our children it’s ok to relax - it’s like you read my mind! It was always frowned upon to be ‘idle’ when I was growing up but why should we feel guilty about a pyjama day if that’s what we need. It’s all part of self-care and self-love. We recently got my daughter a little arm chair and she likes to lean back on it and go ‘Ahhh’ like I do when I’m relaxing on the sofa.

Ooh you’re coming up to 1 week in your quit! Have you got a little treat planned for Monday? I found marking the milestones even in a small way helped to solidify my quit as I went along.

Sorry this feels like a very loooong message so I’ll stop now!

Sending you another hug just because!

Katie

Quit 4th March 2017

Jatchat

From: Jatchat

3/13/21

Thank you Suzy,

I had a video morning with some friends, all non-smokers, safe there, Bought some patches, enough for 28 days, armed for battle.

It's raining here we had a cracker of a storm last night, I veged out in front of the TV and watched the Rugby, Wifey and I did food shopping also yesterday, got home in time to get clothes off line before storm.

All pretty mundane here, not smoking though as I head into 3rd week.

Glad to hear you got through your cravings keep up the good work Suzy

Anthony

KatieKat84

From: KatieKat84

3/13/21

Hey Anthony,

Just wanted to say it’s great to hear how well you’re doing on your quit. Sounds like you’ve got some proper momentum going there. Keep on going :)

Katie

4th March 2017

Jatchat

From: Jatchat

3/14/21

Thanks Katy,

Will endeavour to make headway through the cravings, It's always there the temptation to smoke that is, I keep saying NO to  cigarettes, just hope I can continue to keep this mindset. 

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

3/14/21

Hi Katie, and thanks for your message too, and for the hug! 

I am so glad that I didn't smoke, but I do feel disappointed that my decision was imposed on me (shops shut at twilight in Dawlish Warren!) rather than being my own choice. I suppose I could have gone round to neighbours and begged - I have actually done that before, which feels quite shameful - so at least I didn't do that.  Maybe it's a good thing, actually - I was starting to think that quitting was a breeze, and I'm a bit less complacent now.  And I didn't smoke.  And today was easier.

I'd love to talk to you about my son, but how long have you got??  He is a really kind, good human being, but he has had difficulties with his mental health since the age of 20 (he's 32 now) and there is a cycle of okayness and then not-okayness which is awful for him (and pretty exhausting for us too).  On the plus side, he has recently recognised that there is a problem, and is on the way to getting a proper assessment and therapy.  After all this time it's hard to dare to hope, but I can't help it - I am.  There was just a bit of a backward step the other night, which seemed somehow worse because of the hoping - not sure if that makes sense, but that's how it felt.  Normally I would have smoked on that, and I can't quite believe that I didn't.

Re. family, yes, it's the old stuff and button-pressing, I'm sure.  My sister (who will be 60 this year) still brings up that I criticised her choice of music when she was 15 (I was quite an obnoxious 12 year old I think).   But I remember when she bit her own arm and told our parents I'd done it! The childish part of me still thinks that's worse (well it is, really relaxed.  EVERYONE says so...!).   So yes, a minefield of 'stuff', and half the time we don't even know who's stuff is whose.   I really hope you find a way through with your sister too.  And in the meantime, thank God for friends!

Relaxing is a wonderful thing.  I was also brought up to view idleness as the Devil's Work, but I'm happy to say that I'm pretty good at it now - most of the time, anyway.  I love the image of your daughter leaning back in her mini armchair and going 'aaahhh'.  Beautiful.

I haven't mentioned this before, not sure why, but I know that Sarah Everard lived in your area of London.  My daughter has been really upset by it, and went to Clapham Common last night - mostly  to show Sarah's family that people cared, but also to protest.   There were only four arrests, but she says there was real brutality in the policing - she was shocked by it, and actually feels less safe because of it.   

I have no treats planned for tomorrow, but I do know that I am going to be very proud of myself.  I didn't think I could do this, especially with toothache and my son's current problems (hmm - maybe that's why I chose last Monday, so I would have a good excuse to fail again?), but so far, so good.   You have really helped, Katie, and thank you.

Suzy

  

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

3/14/21

Dear Anthony,

Mundane good, smoking bad. 

You're doing wonderfully, and although I wish you'd quit years ago and were just popping in to encourage the newbies (I wish the same for me!), it is also so lovely to have you here clearing the path to the Clubhouse just in front of me.

Please don't smoke. And please post more of your photos when you can?  They are like Quit Nectar to me - they help me remember how beautiful things can be without poisonous cigarettes.

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

3/14/21

Yeaahhhhh!  Thank you, Anthony. x

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