Opinion Polls: Delphi's Polling Place

Hosted by Showtalk

Opinion polls on all subjects. Opinions? Heck yes, we have opinions - but we're *always* nice about it, even when ours are diametrically opposed to yours. Register your vote today!

  • 4642
    MEMBERS
  • 104877
    MESSAGES
  • 5
    POSTS TODAY

Discussions

Three things that cannot be easily hidde   The Jovial You: Humor, Jokes and Riddles

Started May-25 by WALTER784; 91 views.
WALTER784
Staff

From: WALTER784

May-25

There are three things that cannot be easily hidden: The Sun, The Moon and the Truth.
 
The following are 2 Simple Truths, 5 Rules of Life, and 3 Bonus Rules:
 
SIMPLE TRUTH 1:
Lovers help each other undress before sex.
After sex, they always dress on their own.
Moral of the story -- In life, no one helps you once you're screwed.
 
SIMPLE TRUTH 2:
When a woman is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say, "Congratulations."
But none go up to the man, touch his pe##s and say, "Good Job."
Moral of the story -- Hard work is rarely appreciated.
 
FIVE RULES TO REMEMBER IN LIFE:
1. Money can't buy happiness - but it's far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy - but remember the ####'s name.
3. If you help someone when they're in trouble - they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Alcohol does not solve any problems - but then, neither does milk.
5. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
 
BONUS RULES: 
1. Condoms do not guarantee safe sex! A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.
2. I think all politicians should wear uniforms. You know, like NASCAR drivers, so we could identify their corporate sponsors.
3. Also, all politicians should serve only two terms - one in office and one in prison.
 
This was a public service announcement. No need to thank me
 
FWIW
Showtalk
Host

From: Showtalk

May-26

 all politicians should serve only two terms - one in office and one in prison !!!

WALTER784
Staff

From: WALTER784

May-27

LOL... yeah... I liked that one the best!

FWIW

TOP