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My new journey with the big C   Quit Stories and Journals

Started 11/11/16 by Rich (lexx0); 225083 views.
Triff (breathefree)

From: Triff (breathefree)

6/23/19

Hi Mary I so agree with your words.Keep on fighting is the only way to go if Iwant to ride my broomstick again.The meds are not helping me in one way but good in another.

So good to see you around on your forever quit,I know there are still times where the demon tempts you but the best way is to NOPE and learn to accept you may never every smoke agai.

Triff

Rich (lexx0)

From: Rich (lexx0)

6/23/19

Well my CT had a mixed bag of results.  I don't have lung cancer 'atm', they did find that I now have Crohn's <sp> disease. Further tests and another specialist next month to confirm and start treatment. I was sorely hoping to call it a day on medical tests, doctors, and waiting, sigh ;(

I hope you're better at whatever has afflicted you. You don't deserve it either.  Linda is a full-time job now and she resents that. I also think she is getting Alzheimer's, early onset anyways.  She forgot almost every detail of her last doctor visit and her temper and sleeplessness are getting worse by the day.

Glad I have the bike for errands ;D

Rich   Get better Triff!

Triff (breathefree)

From: Triff (breathefree)

6/23/19

Rich interesting word there.I would think it was something to do with time or something from your original treatment.I do hope it just means warts or something boring.

I do feel for you and know that bike really saves your sanity.

I am coming out of a huge mess etc caused by a new med.I have reduced it and I can now think although the results of the Morphine like med had left me with one of the common problems.poop I made it through another night and by asking myself at an earlier time and having meds it is averting the exacerbation some what.

Linda is so lucky to have such a devoted hubby/carer and I am better without mine now.I do miss my wee companion though and just talk to myself now.

Family moves out in two weeks

I wonder what those cronos do?

Triff

Rich (lexx0)

From: Rich (lexx0)

6/23/19

Aye, I misspelled it, its Crohns, sheesh.  Yah I have had some symptoms without knowing, I associated with chemo/ etc.

Yeap, bike keeps me sane. Linda would like her independence now. Not thinking right of course. Lots of anger from the doctor refusing to replace her shoulder, too high a risk for infection and too many hours for the operation. They would rather do half way and just remove the rubbing pain part. I don't blame her and whatever she wants I try to accommodate. 

Yes, sweetie, I'm so sorry meds are your problem.  Linda's were as well.  I don't what we can do past research and you still can't reject one out of hand because it fails on others.  Oh to be young again eh?  The only way I can look at any of this its another day, and I do know what you mean 'by another night'!

What are you going to do when your help moves out? I have a friend in TN that has end stages of Crohns' and his family doesn't do any more than they have to. Sad. He spent his last 10 good years caring for his crazy mother with dementia.  All we can do is hope for the best next day and hope insurance sends someone to look after you once in a while.  Its also another day that I think we both agree, that Steven would be glad to of had.

I'm here if you need to talk as always.  Just don't text me on the bike ;D

Rich

Triff (breathefree)

From: Triff (breathefree)

7/2/19

I have just been told I may be able to have sleep studies done at home.I wonder how that will work and if I can still use my rescue methods during it or perhaps wont sleep.I thin you did those didnt you?Any info is good

Triff

Rich (lexx0)

From: Rich (lexx0)

7/2/19

Sorry Triff, I did have a sleep study ordered, but I never followed through with it. At the time I was all itchy from a lifetime of skin rash that I didn't want to deal with it then.  I know I have sleep issues and should get this done as well.  If they can do this at home, great.  Your body will still have that basic instinct to jump up outta sleep and 'save yourself'.  I've had countless incidents where I've literally jumped out of bed and stomped around the room to get rid of a panic.

Try not to fight the sleep.  That is how they determine if your breathing or heart rate cease while your asleep or going under. I get a crazy sensation sometimes of when falling asleep a panic that feels like falling off a cliff or worse.  I wish the best for you.  I too will do this someday soon.

Rich

Triff (breathefree)

From: Triff (breathefree)

7/2/19

Thnaks Rich for describing the normalacy of it all.I must have gone onto my back and woke with the screaming desire to jump out of bed too.I lay with my rescue inhaler thren moved tothe meds beside the bed to slow it all down.I bet I would rip all the stuff off in panic when you get tothat cant breathe moment.Two hours later I had some control but today I am zonked. I will see what exactly they want before I worry or give up without trying.being on my own makes it worse so perhaps find someone to be here just incase

Triff (breathefree)

From: Triff (breathefree)

7/8/19

Just checking in to see what July brings us all.For me an amazing little step forward and at the same time loss of the support I did have.Its very cold and I am doing my best to stay warm.I miss my wee fluffy companion .

Triff

Rich (lexx0)

From: Rich (lexx0)

7/9/19

Oh so your down under in winter time ;(.  We're having a 90F heat spell with thunderstorms daily.  I ride between cloud bursts, although not successfully.  Best days are always 'hospital visit' days and after 4hrs there when I get home with takeout, the rain starts 15 mins after eating ;p

Aye, I can't imagine losing your family AND your furry baby too.  Hope things work out for you. The better you get I'm hoping the lessor of the other panic style attacks you will get ;(  Keep in touch.  I'm still waiting over a week just o make a gastro appt, they won't return my call and my doc leaves in 3 weeks for another hospital.

Rich

Triff (breathefree)

From: Triff (breathefree)

7/17/19

Hi one thing I miss is having the fire lit for me in the morning.Its quite cold and frosty too.

I got a letter today to say my test equipment will be sent 1st week of August so I will be good and use it in the hope it can help me get more treatment etc to improve thing for me.

I bet now its great riding the breeze in summer for you.My thoughts to you both and I wonder if your family has departed too?

Triff

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