About Smoking Cessation Forum

Hosted by Terry (abquitsmking)

Formerly known as the About.com Smoking Cessation support forum, this community is open to all who are recovering from nicotine addiction.

  • 4711
    MEMBERS
  • 262163
    MESSAGES
  • 10
    POSTS TODAY

Discussions

Quitting Causing Depression   General Chit-Chat

Started 5/2/19 by missmypal; 11965 views.
spartanfan

From: spartanfan

5/3/19

Hey Marci...I know we’ve chatted about this before...and since we’re so close with our quit dates I can’t tell you when the depression goes away, but did want you to know I’m still dealing with it too.  I think I’ve always had some sort of depression/anxiety, which I hid from by smoking it away...so I’m probably dealing with facing that reality as well as the decrease in dopamine and serotonin from quitting.  I’m on anti-depressants and still feeling sh***y.  So you’re not alone.  Smoked for 29 1/2 years, 47 years old. 

I’m looking at this whole year as a year of tremendous growth.  It’s painful and scary and exhilarating at the same time.  Muddling through...we’ll do it together!

julie

missmypal

From: missmypal

5/3/19

Thanks, Julie. I was at my family doc’s today and mentioned the quit as a source of unease, to put it mildly. She mentioned something about missing “the ritual” and that rung true. Coffee and a cigarette in the morning is the toughest. Even when I was smoking just one cigarette a day it was that morning coffee one. So that’s something I never gave up. And, yes, I feel sad without it. I am convinced that not smoking has at least a small part to play in my lingering depression. I’ve battled depression since college, even while smoking, so being smoke free can’t take all the blame. But I feel that I’m still battling my drug of choice - cigarettes — and, as you’ve said, I can’t mask my bad feelings anymore so they are surfacing like ghosts. I smoked my way through a lot of painful events and they are clamoring to be heard now. So maybe it’s a yucky time but also a time of growth. We’ve just got to keep moving forward and one day we’ll be past this. I hope it’s soon. Five months isn’t a long time in the 45 years that I smoked. Let’s keep talking. It helps me to battle through.

xo

Marci

missmypal

From: missmypal

5/3/19

Thanks, Cindi. It is reassuring to know that you went through this and it did end. I’m not going back to cigarettes so I’ll just have to wait it out. Damn those corporations who make money from our addiction. I include the pain med companies in that, along with cigarette and vape companies. They’ve numbed our pain but it’s killing us. At the end, I was smoking menthol. I wonder if it’s made withdrawal worse. Please keep writing me, Cindi. Remind me that this does end and life can look good again. Thank you

Marci

Amicahomi

From: Amicahomi

5/3/19

I'm feeling it too,Missmypal.  Was at my Cardio md yesterday (my 1 month quit mark) with serious palps and sky-high pressure.  I mentioned having anxiety without any reason.  Doc said it could be related to quitting, changed my heart meds up and prescribed me a few benzos.  I don't drink and am not using NRT.  Anyway, like magic the palps and pressure dropped off dramatically today.  Didn't need the Xanax. 

Like you, I didn't recognize myself and have no interest is smoking again.  My takeaway is, who knows what's lurking behind nicotine addiction.  Things can get better very quickly.  I have the feeling there was some masking going on during smoking.  Now I want to keep things in perspective and carry on with the better aspects of cig-free life.

Hang in there, maybe check things out with a health pro.  You're in my thoughts.

missmypal

From: missmypal

5/3/19

You know, you mentioning that you didn’t know what it was like to be a non-smoker reminds me that I often say “I want to get back to who I used to be” or “ I don’t know who I am anymore.” I didn’t think those feelings were related to smoking but now I am. It’s strange because I was a closet smoker. No one saw me smoke. Everyone thought of me as a non smoker. 

missmypal

From: missmypal

5/3/19

Thank you for your support and care. Keep us up to date on your heart health as your quit gets deeper. 

xo

Matci

Triff (breathefree)

From: Triff (breathefree)

5/4/19

missmypal It will pass but sadly many of us feel it and I have an elderly friend who quit a bit longer than you.She really had problems as she had mental health challenges but now its evening out and she is marvellous.

Keep telling yourself how clever you are while telling Nicodemon To Beep off.

I do remember many other quitters cried their way along the journey but then now we are all so much stronger and very proud of ourselves.For me I had a list of things to do to keep our quit.One thing was a treat or action for a down moment.Naps were good,aromatherapy baths excellent,swimming ,walking aqua jogging or anything to help you through those sad,tearful moments.

Triff

CindiS319

From: CindiS319

5/4/19

Hi Marci,

That is really a good point.  Even though everyone else thought of you as a non-smoker, how did you see yourself?  Smoking is so time consuming, when you quit it's like you don't know what the heck to do with all that time.  Plus how much time we spent planning on where and when we were going to get our next fix (especially if you were a closet smoker) you probably don't know what to do with all this extra time.  Try and find some new hobbies or something fun to take up all this time you now have.  It will help take your mind off it.  I remember time going so slow the first few months.  Sometimes I would just go to bed early because I wanted to smoke so bad and couldn't shake it.  Sometimes I would just sit and cry because I felt so frustrated.  Didn't help the fact that my husband still smoked and still does.  Now I could really care less.  I actually get aggravated when he has to stop and take the time to smoke and I have to wait for him. rage

Anyway, just do whatever you need to....just don't smoke.  It's the hardest thing I've ever done in my life but it will get better (I will keep telling you that) and you are doing it.  Hugs to you my new friend!

missmypal

From: missmypal

5/4/19

Yup, empty weekends are hard. Thanks, thanks, thanks for your support. It really means a lot. I love being called your “new friend.” 

xo

Marci

slowblumer

From: slowblumer

5/4/19

missmypal said:

“I want to get back to who I used to be” or “ I don’t know who I am anymore.” I didn’t think those feelings were related to smoking but now I am.

Hi Marci,

That's a right on way to describe how we feel once we quit smoking.  Our lives were wrapped up in 'feeding the beast'.  Smoking was intermingled in every thing we did.  Once we quit, we have to learn to live as a non-smoker.  The first couple of months I didn't want to get out of bed because I could not smoke.  Now I see the addiction made me feel that way. 

My doc put me on an anti depressant for a full year and it helped.  However it was not until month 10 that I really turned a corner in the quit. 

So, keep on keeping on because it will happen for you in whatever time it takes.  I was a long time smoker  (over 40 yrs).  We are all different in the amount of time we smoked and our health at the time.   You will find that it will be all be worth this struggle.  

TOP