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Alexandra's Quit Story   Quit Stories and Journals

Started 9/23/15 by alEXsmoker (afrancis333); 46814 views.
Brenda (1sept19)

From: Brenda (1sept19)

3/29/20

Hello Alex,

   Hope this note finds you and your family healthy and well.  Wanted to congratulate you on 7 months of freedom.  This has been a tough year for 2 newly quit ex smokers, but we are doing this.  Just thinking of you, hope you are good.

SusanK1960

From: SusanK1960

3/30/20

Hi Alex,
Bravo to you!  7 months quit is impressive.  I hope time has eased some of your pain and that you are feeling solid in your quit.  Stay well.

alexisfree

From: alexisfree

4/14/20

Thank you so much Brenda!  Congratulations to you too!!  We’ve been thru the wringer, but we are doing it smoke free!!!

alexisfree

From: alexisfree

4/14/20

Thanks Susan!  Crazy times we live in, but I thank God I am safe, healthy, and smoke free today!

Brenda (1sept19)

From: Brenda (1sept19)

4/19/20

So glad to hear from you and that you are well.  Yes, I figure if we can get through all that life has thrown at us and others smokefree, we can do anything.  Stay happy, safe and well and give your family a big hug from me.  So proud of you, Alex.

alexisfree

From: alexisfree

Apr-30

I'm so glad we're still doing this.  Congrats early on 8 months!  Life has been so crazy.  I've gained 5 lbs while in quarantine with my two daughters and husband.  Our hot water heater broke.  BUT, I have NOT smoked.  I am not going to lie - I've thought about it.  But I have been no where near caving.  I'm so glad to have my quit.  The plumber came by today and installed a new hot water heater and I immediately went and took a hot bath!  It was glorious!  It is funny how much I used to take for granted.  I pray I will remain grateful for clean hot running water, time with friends and family, and the ability to hug someone I love.  I've been very emotional and eating a lot of pop tarts.  I don't know why I choose these obscure food items for my stressful moments?  LOL...anyway...the girls are going back to daycare on Monday and I'm still working from home until May 15th.  So that's good.  I'm thinking about taking some time off next week so I can get my mind right.  I need some time to decompress.  My chest feels heavy.  I think its from all the terrible eating.  Oh, probably heartburn.  I love how I just type my stream of consciousness here.  It definitely helps.  Very cathartic.  I think I may need to start reading more so I have more words to express the way I feel.  Anyway, I pray that you are well, safe, and you're definitely loved!  xoxo

Brenda (1sept19)

From: Brenda (1sept19)

May-2

Thank you , Sweety.  I am so proud of you too.  I have also thought about smoking but am able to brush off the thoughts pretty well. It sounds like you have been hanging in there with all that is going on, it has definitely taught me to be grateful for what I have, what I have had, love, friends and the good times.  You are a special person, Alex, be so proud of yourself and what you have done. On to #9!!

 

alexisfree

From: alexisfree

Jun-8

Brenda!!!

How are you my love?!  I've been CRAZY lately.  All the dark thoughts are coming and I'm so sad about the state of our nation.  I wish I could individually go around and hug everyone who is hurting.  I have no desire to smoke, but I know if I allow anger and sadness to permeate my thoughts much longer, I may do just that.  grimacing I'm coming on here to type as a healthy alternative to smoking or drinking or having evil thoughts.  I so badly want to fix the world's problems, but I know I am only one person.  The bright eyes I used to have from childhood have left me.  I used to think, "all people are inherently good."  Now I think, "this person is evil" or "that person is evil".  It is not good.  I prayed several prayers this morning.  I did my meditation (kind of - best I could with the two littles).  I'm starting to feel relief, but I am angry.  I'm sad about how my daughter may receive hate from others.  I know the answer is to "be the change I want to see in the world".  I don't know how to properly love people when I hear their ignorance.  I hope God will reveal to me how I should be.  And soon.  Much love!  xoxo

Brenda (1sept19)

From: Brenda (1sept19)

Jun-9

Dearest Alex,

   I understand your sadness and grief over what is happening in the U.S. and all over for that matter.  It breaks my heart also.  I think we are all going through an overwhelming and unsure time in our lives and our history, but I think most people, myself included, long for a nation and world that is united, where all lives matter and people can live their lives with respect and dignity.  I hope with all my heart that the people who talk and show hate and prejudice are few and that the rest of us will triumph. I believe the only thing we can do is to not let hate take over our hearts and to hold people that hate accountable for their crimes against others.  I wish that I too could fix things and make them better or had the answers to a better life for all, but all I know to do is to be the best person and friend to others that I can be.  I hope your beautiful daughters never have to feel hate or disrespect.   What a wonderful world it would be if we all treated each other as we want to be treated.  I hope that the minority of people who hate don't take away the rest of us' hope for a better world where we live as one race of human beings.  Don't let their hate change you, Alex.  Don't let their hate make you feel less or make you smoke.  Remember who you are.  A beautiful woman who loves her family and is just trying to make the best life possible for them.  I, for one, refuse to let the haters infect my soul.  I believe most of us want the same thing.  I wish you peace, Alex, as I wish for all of us.   

alexisfree

From: alexisfree

Jun-12

Brenda (1sept19) said:

I, for one, refuse to let the haters infect my soul

Amen!  I'm glad you said this.  I want a beautiful soul.  I will strive to keep on loving.  It is hard, but I remembered yesterday that Jesus told me to forgive 70 x 7 times.  I will pray for strength and guidance.  Love you Brenda.  I'm so glad we're both still here.  We're coming up on 10 months soon!  :D

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