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Where is everyone from?   General Chit-Chat

Started 8/26/19 by Jan2185; 5690 views.
Ovivi

From: Ovivi

Jan-22

I’m so sorry about your mother, Maja.

She would surely be so proud of you that you’ve decided no more smoking. 
Keep going, you are doing fine, and it’ll get easier soon I hope!  

In reply toRe: msg 61
Majomar

From: Majomar

Jan-27

Brenda and Ovivi,

thank you. Your words of support mean a lot.

It's been rough these days and I'm sorry I didn't answer earlier.

But, I'm hanging in there, hoping it will get easier. Some days it seems as it will get easier, but other, last week... depression was the biggest problem, complete breakdowns and getting up and again breaking and feeling terrible. And, as all of my friends smoke, I was exposed to abnormal amount of smoke - in the middle of three chain-smokers two nights ago, for hours, and my skin allergies were back and depression hit harder, I had almost a nervous breakdown and brain fog just doesn't go away... as if I'm back to the beginning, even if I didn't smoke! I knew it was not good to be exposed to smoke (it is not the first time since I quit), but I just wanted to get out of the house, as I'm stuck for months taking care of the house and father and everyone in the family who is not feeling OK, or is ill, or has different problems... and I haven't had the time to deal with the loss and trauma of losing my mother. I'm just... tired. And sad.

She would be really proud and happy, she suffered so much for not being able to get rid of her own nicotine addiction, she got every possible chronic lung disease there is and, at the end, cancer on top of that... her end was inexplicably painful and hard. No being should suffer like that. 

She was the strongest person I know, who could bear unbearable, but this one weakness... took her away and made her life really hard for too long.

So, be smart, everyone, just as we all should be strong, for our own and for the sake of our loved ones.

  • Edited January 27, 2020 5:48 pm  by  Majomar
nomosmok

From: nomosmok

Jan-29

Hi Majomar

Please accept my condolences for the lose of your mother. Death of a loved one is never easy & grieving is the hardest thing we humans have to go through in this life.  I’ve lost my father, my mother & my husband. Each grief was very hard & each one was different depending on our relationship. Don’t let anyone tell you how to grieve or how long to grieve because it’s individual to each person. 
I appreciate you sharing your feelings & respect how you are walking through them without smoking. In the past when I would quit, when I would have strong feelings, I would smoke because I couldn’t deal with them. This quit I have vowed to walk through my feelings whatever they may be & not smoke. So you are a big inspiration to me because I can relate to what you are feeling & still you don’t smoke. So proud of you!  You can do this & it will get easier. Don’t forget that you’re grieving & grief just takes time to heal. Be patient & loving with yourself during this time.  
Your English is perfect & you express yourself so well that I could never tell it was a second language to you. Keep posting, Majomar!  So far you’ve been very helpful to me with what you share.  I only wish I can be there for you & be supportive for you too. 

nomosmok

ex-tobacco user 1/21/20 7:34pm

AliceMay5

From: AliceMay5

Jan-29

Laughs.  I am from NSW, Australia.  The beautiful shore of Lake Macquarie.  I am not going to fill up the pavements ANYMORE!

Majomar

From: Majomar

Feb-4

Dear nomosmok,

thank you for your kind and warm words of condolences and support, I keep remembering what you wrote, because they help me find the strength.

I believe in everything you said. It is especially hard to go through tough periods without a cigarette, but it is a challenge we have to answer to and not find excuses to succumb to our weakness. it will not make us more resilient, quite the opposite. We just have to remember it, at all times.

That is how I try and have managed so far.

nomosmok

From: nomosmok

Feb-4

Hi Majomar!

Good to see you!  Yes, I agree that we grow resilient walking through tough situations & not smoking!  That’s what we are doing everyday we don’t smoke. 
How are you doing?  I have been thinking about you & hope that you’re alright. I know it’s sad what you are going through but hope you are okay.  I am here for you. 
nomosmok

1/21/20 7:34pm

DebraAnne60

From: DebraAnne60

Feb-4

Hi, how are you doing?  I too have quite cold turkey no replacements or drugs.  I think it is a cleaner and quicker way to quite.  I wanted to touch base with you and let you know that I am with you 100%.  How many days/weeks or months have you quit?  I only have 4 weeks.  Do you have nightmares?  I wondered if the supplements you are taking might calm the bad dreams.  What do you think?

DebraAnne60

From: DebraAnne60

Feb-4

I am from Canada (province of Ontario)

Majomar

From: Majomar

Feb-5

Thank you, nomosmok :)

I had a rough time lately... But there were some people whose support and love helped trough the worst, I changed my supplementation and came again here and I feel better. I felt as if there was something wrong with me and I'll just keep falling apart and the crisis will never end, but I see many people feel that way and it will pass. Sorrow has many faces and many phases, quitting cigrettes is also a complex process, we have to be gentle to ourselves and give it time... I keep remembering what a friend of mine said the first day I quit - try to enjoy the crisis, like, enjoy all of it, it sounds silly, but it isn't, it's like... the essence of the healing process. It's like a process of rebirth. It's painful, but... Joyful at the same time. 

Deep breathing and taking it one step at a time...

I hope you're doing well :)

Majomar

From: Majomar

Feb-5

Hi, DebraAnne69,

I'm doing OK, thank you :)

I'm 39 days and 3 hours smoke-free. I did have nightmares sometimes, but I don't know if it's because of quitting or another trauma. I do find supplements I take now helpful, in terms of mood stabilisation, calmness and nerve "strength". I don't know how bad your nightmares are, but I feel them sometimes as part of cleaning process, in the mind, not comfortable but not necessarily bad. Sleep hygiene is important, I believe. Like,no smartphone, no computer, no TV a couple of hours before bedtime, going to bed at the same time, light dinner - Ijust remembered, for the first couple of weeks I ate really a lot and would it in the evening, heavy food, that provoked some nightmares! Pay attention to your diet, day and night routine, some supplements like Magnesium and B vitamins, relaxation techniques and I believe they will go away.

Best wishes 

P.S. And congratulations on your 4 weeks! It's great! As you can see, I'm not that far away from you, I think every day is a victory and every day we are a bit closer to complete freedom. We starved the monster quite a bit...

  • Edited February 5, 2020 2:33 pm  by  Majomar
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