So the trip was better than I thought it would be. I left Friday afternoon and I got back late Sunday, but Monday I did some sleeping and had a bunch of appointments do I didn't log on here. Today was my first day back at work. Anyhoo, it was at a campground but my husband did a fabulous job researching this place and it was tent only no electricity, so that ruled out the RV crowd. He also got a spot that was a little way in the forest, away from other people. We couldn't hear or see anyone, and we had to lug our stuff up a dirt trail. Right on the lake, too. Surprisingly, I didn't think about smoking too much. I woke up before 7 each morning which is unheard of for me. I drank hot tea and read until my husband got up. We had great meals and talked and hiked up a few hills. Lots of deer, chipmunks and toads. I admit I had to pop a lozenge immediately after waking and I had to have one after lunch and dinner. I only had three per day, and I'm calling that a victory. I think getting away helped, honestly. It sounds super lame but bring away from the ability to buy cigarettes, as well as a change of environment was good. I won't lie and say I didn't think about smoking, because I did. On Saturday after dinner I was getting pretty ancy. But my husband took me up the hill and we came back and lit a fire and made smores. When I woke up in the mornings I wanted to smoke pretty bad too. I just kept drinking tons of tea and reading. And looking for more toads. The lozenges really saved my bacon. I don't know how well I would have done without them. All in all it went well and I'm glad I went. If anyone here has the chance, I highly recommend getting out, even if only for a bike ride or a walk to the grocery store. I found it peaceful and restoring, healing and confidence building. I CAN do things I want to do without having a meltdown and smoking. I CAN rethink who I am now, and i am joyously becoming. 

That's absolutely fabulous. You were so nervous about the trip and it actually helped. You stuck to tea and patches and were not consumed by the cravings. Sounds like your husband is very supportive. People always say, go outside, do't stay indoors all the the time, and its true, but then I forget...until the next time I go into nature and then i say, why an I not doing this more often?

What did you do with the toads you found?

I just petted the toads and watched them hop around. They are kind of a brownish color and honestly, Ive never seen any like them before. Super creepy that there were more of them out at night. That's how I found the first ones I saw something moving on my way to the tent for bed. Then there were more! I'm going to do some research on them. I even made it without patches, just lozenges! I'm on the 2 mg lozenges and holding steady!

According to my husband it's the western montana toad. You should check it out. Definitely explains why they were out at night.

Sorry I wrote patches instead of lozenges.. I'm looking at a photo of this toad online...look big!

They are huge! I was walking and something moved in front of me, I lowered my flashlight and there were three, kind of crawling/half hopping along. I've never seen them before and didn't expect anything at night!

I don't think I have seen toads maybe ever!

No way! We need to get you out of Brooklyn for a little bit to do some exploring! Tadpoles are pretty cute too. I once rode a greyhound to Chicago and we stopped in Iowa to pee and get snacks. I have never seen such huge insects! I mean, massive! Did I mention that in Montana there is very little racial diversity, and I was enamored with the idea that not everyone looked like me in other parts of the country. It was amazing and I learned a lot. PS don't sit on a bus for three days. 

Well, since you say there are giant insects in Iowa, I shall not be traveling to Iowa anytime soon. There is danger that I will be sitting on a bus for 5 hours let alone 3 days... :)

I am going upstate NY, which is stunning, soon, which is a reprieve. The reason I did not go earlier is because the prices of all accommodation there soared by 400%.New Yorkers couldn't fly anywhere so they all went upstate and its was all booked and expensive.. I'm lucky my friend rents the same cottage every year so they didn't screw her on the price and i can visit here there, in a couple of weeks.

I am not so big on camping and RV's. I was forced to do a lot of  camping when I was young, but the really basic one, we had to build tents from army blankets, stones, ropes and rods, and eat from cans only . I was forced to take these long treks up and down some mountains, in the hot summer sun with bees and other insects flying around, to see a 'river' of a ' water fall' which, if we were lucky was a brook with some drizzle. We always camped in a 'forest', an un-lush and unappealing, affair mostly populated by pines. One  time, a kid was bitten by a yellow scorpion , and had to be taken to a hospital. I hated it. scarred for life. So...no.

 I would do glamping I think. But like 5 stars glamping.

Come to Brooklyn, you will see so much diversity, your head will spin.

I bet my head would spin! The place I live has kind people who are not prejudiced, but just have little experience with other cultures. I've heard our restaurants aren't authentic because the food has to be westernized for us to buy it. I always wonder how our Thai restaurant compares to others. It sounds like you had a terrible time camping. Maybe you better stick to the 5 star. I think it's something you dig or don't. My mom wasn't very outdoorsy but my older sister is. There was a company that made guidebooks for Montana trails and she was always going into the woods to explore and chart things. She was always showing me the wonders of the world around me. She is really into science and nature. She's kind of granola, as we say here. A lot of fun, but she takes her outdoors seriously. I do not. So tell me about your trip! How long will you be gone? Are you taking your cats? What's the weather like there? Are you hanging out with your friend or going it alone?