Thanks Kathy.  Your support means a lot to me.  Thank you!

Thanks girl.... The support here is amazing.  I am so blessed to have you all on my side!!

Andrew....

Thank you so much for your well wishes!

I am back to 6 lozenges a day.  I suck on them after meals and snacks.  I think they act like an appetite suppressant for me.  It sucks.  I want to quit... But they are just so satisfying after eating.

Andrew, you are doing great!  Day 3 with no NRT is amazing!!  Like Anne said, substitute smoking with healthy activities like walking, lifting weights, you like music.... Blast music!

We are here for you!

Anthony

Hi there.  How are you doing?  Hope all is going well with you?

Kathy

Hi there Kathy, 

I'm not doing well on the non smoking side of the ledger, but having a ball otherwise.

How about you?

In Christ

Anthony

Anthony

Great to hear you are doing well.....hopefully the non smoking will happen for you on another day.  

I am doing okay, still adjusting to a new baby in the house.  She makes not smoking easy, come home after work and have a baby in the arms..........no way can I smoke then!  Hoping the weather is starting to turn warmer, we had snow yesterday.......kind of just done with winter!

Hope to see you on here soon

Kathy

Hi Antony,

It's a struggle for all of us. Until hopefully someday it is not. Doesn't hurt to pick another quit day and try again.

Hope you had a good Easter.

Paul

Thanks Paul,

Actually starting to quit again, thanks for the encouragement

Tony

Your rambling has a lot of wisdom. Once again I have fallen into the trap. It happened late at nighta few days ago when I got up to go to the bathroom and I found an ashtray with some partially smoked cigs (my wife's). I made an impulsive move (oh, I'll just take a few puffs) Well, you know where that led to.

I thought my attitude was bulletproof. Nothing was to get in my way. My confidence was higher than ever before. But that didn't matter because I really wanted to try it again. Only a few puffs and my addict self was in control.  

Well it's back to square one. I don't have a new plan, but I know it will be soon because if I go too long it will be that much more difficult. I bought one pack the day I started up, then 2 packs the next day and today I am thinking of a carton to save a little money. Bad idea!

I was doing so well. I was ready to quit for good and still am. My plan was well thought out. I simply need to renew my commitment and do it. How about next week Monday the 25th ? Wish me well and thanks to all for your support and understanding.

Good day,

Andrew

Ahhh Andrew.

I think in this grand life we have it’s best to stay focused on the positive best as we can. You had some time under your belt. Then a step back. Ok. Well, as you know, you can get at least that far again! Dust off, stand up, dig in, lean in and carry on. The good news is you are understanding the addict inside you and recognize that voice. More good news, you don’t want to just throw in the towel and you want to go at it again. And the days you were stopped are not lost days! They are success! 
I so wish there were a magic bullet to give folks. But then, this Forum and all of the lovely committed people wouldn’t be here. But we are here, and we all have one thing in common. We all know the absolute struggle this is. You came back to share your news. That’s more good news! I know these seem like small things when we have given in to the addiction and feel that feeling of failure. I’ve been there. We all have. 

I’ve got some time now, but that’s after many years of wanting to stop, trying to stop, failing to stop, rationalizing starting again…all of it. The only thing that has worked so far for me has been completely accepting the addict part of me. Not fighting that piece. When it screams the loudest that’s when it needs the most empathy and compassion and acceptance. I let it be with me. I accept that piece completely as one facet of my mind. A separate piece that will always be there. Over time it’s voice has become much less dominant and loud. But, honestly, it’s still there. So much less. For now I accept it probably will always speak up in certain moments. Yes, even still.  Early on it took a lot of energy to just step back and focus on the separate piece it is and just let it be. I didn’t struggle with so much as worked on focusing on the one piece it is, embracing it, talking to it, at times nurturing and soothing it and at times looking it square on and having a stare down. I don’t know if any of this makes any sense Andrew! But over time I’d find ways to come to terms with it. You will too. Dig in. Hunker down with it. When it speaks, say, “ oh, hi. There you are. Come on in and sit down a while.”

I guess what I’m trying to say is I learned to find ways to accept and not fight. What we resist persists. That’s not just a political statement as much as a fact of life really. To those that have had a teenager, it is a fact of life, haha! And if you have never had one, you at least have been one! Well, I honestly believe that piece of us is terminally stuck in that teenager phase as that’s when most of us started. I think I wrote something about that earlier in my quit. Coming to terms with my angsty teen inside. 

Anyway, more rambles. 

Hang in there Andrew. Stay in the moment.