Yes Marge I do have a paid subscription.  I really wish I understood how to do the graphics.  I know how to attach files but I don’t really know where everyone is getting all the great graphics from.  If I hit the “attach” button it goes right to my camera. I’m not trying to post one of my pictures on my camera.  Anyway, I plan on being here for a long while to conquer this addiction. It may just take me a longer time than others to grasp this concept.  Can you tell I am a Special Education teacher?  Love technology!

Hi Cindi,  

i hope that you survived your bad awful day and that you are feeling better.  Can totally relate to how you felt. It’s amazing that we can still have some really crappy days.  So many doctors told me just “stop and you will feel so much better in three days after the nicotine is out of your system”. Totally not true!  Anyway, now that we are officially March Warriors I think it is a great idea to share some of our personal stories!  I am 59 years old and have been married for 35 years. My two sons are in their 30’s and both married. One has 2 children (boy and girl) and the other has fur babies. They both seem happy with their lives but don’t share a lot of time together. That makes me sad as a mom.  I am a retired Special Education teacher but work part time as a tutor now.  I started smoking when I was 14 years old.  Smoked with friends behind the church after Sunday services.  I was hooked from then on. Both of my parents smoked as did two older brothers and sister.  I was the youngest of six and had a sister with Down’s Syndrome who was three years older than me. She and I were very close but she passed away 12 years ago.  I lost both my parents in 1980  (died one month apart). I was an orphan at the age of 20!  Overall, I have had a good life with the exception of my battles with depression and anxiety. I loved my jobs in the Special Education field and enjoy working with kids.  These days, I am most happy when I spend time with friends and family. I hope to add more fun things to “do”  in the near future since I am not smoking anymore.  It seems that my need for having a smoke has put a big dent in my “fun things to do” category.  Looking forward to freedom, peace and good health in my senior years.  

Ok Marge, I don’t know what happened here. I was typing a reply to you, then I left for a moment to get something to drink, when I came back the message was gone and I was logged out. I looked to see if what I had written so far was somehow posted but I didn’t see it. I haven’t had this happen before. I logged in again and I’m going to try to retype it. If the first attempt shows up unfinished and this one too, idk...awkward but, at least you’ll know what happened. I’m still wondering why that happened though. 

I was trying to say thanks and that I copied that picture too. It’s so true especially when it comes to cigarettes. I remember a long time ago I tried to cut back on my cigarettes, and said I was ‘trying to quit’. It didn’t and doesn’t work. I’ve tried several times to quit over the years. The last time I quit, which was great, I made the mistake of thinking ‘I quit, it’s just one, I can handle it.’ Wrong. I was right back to smoking. That was in 2016. Now here I am two years later. Anyway, your sign is a good reminder that there is no middle ground when it comes to cigarette addiction. I think I’ll put this one up too, and I’ve already put it on my phone since it’s with me wherever I go. I keep telling myself I can do this. 

On a completely different note, I’ve recently been told that sometimes lately I’ve came across on occasion sounding a bit short or grumpy. I apologized. I certainly don’t mean to sound that way with anyone. Actually I didn’t realize I was being that way. If I sounded that way I think it may be because of nerves during this quit, but I’m trying to watch my tone more now. Any ideas about this? Thanks. 

Hey Debbie, 

     Thank you. It does feel great. I still have my moments but, thanks to you all, I’m handling them a little better. I’m so determined, still I’m trying not to get too far ahead of myself though, like you said, one crave at a time. There is something I’d like to talk about. A friend of the family said they were coming for a visit. This person smokes. I said we’d like that, but that I needed to let them know that they couldn’t smoke in the house now, since my better half has heart issues and doesn’t need to be around the smoke and I had quit. I said they were more than welcome to smoke outside though, just not in the house, and that we were really looking forward to seeing them again. Long story short, they’re not coming. That’s disappointing. I guess it also reminds us of how much value we place on cigarettes when we smoke. 

Hey Marilyn, 

     I agree. I had multiple quits in the past and hate having to start over. Like you, I’m determined to succeed this time. I really believe we can too. It’s still not easy but I look forward to it getting easier as we go. In the meantime I’m just trying to handle each day as it comes. 

Wishing you the best too, 

Denim50 

I'm really hoping it gets easier.  I mean it has already but I think that is just cause I am not working anymore.  But I got some pretty strong cravings last night so I just went to sleep at 6 pm.  Woke up at 4 am but I didn't smoke and that is what is important.

Hi Cindi, 

That missing 'something' is the constant companion of every ex-smoker for quite a while.  It's a very mental thing.  If you can accept it is there for now, it i will be slightly easier.   Also you are so right about the H.A.L.T..   Whenever we are hungry, angry, lonely or tired the brain will make a suggestion and we all know what that suggestion is.    Now, you are building new associations but will take time and patience to turn around but it will happen.

This addiction is insidious but you are on the journey to beat it.  The other alternative is like a run on the hamster wheel- it never ends.                                           

I only want one!

and probably another

and then maybe one more..... that journey also starts with the first one - and that journey I don't want.

Hi Marilyn,

So, Let's try this from a different angle.   Go to this link and scroll down to the stars.  Find one you like.  Right click on the star and select 'copy'.  The go up and click on the arrow next to your profile picture and select 'My Preferences'.  Then go to Personal Signature and choose 'edit'.   Put your cursor where you want your star, right click and select 'paste'.   You may get a message window that asks you to use Ctrl +V to paste then save changes.  The star should now be in your signature..  If this does not work, let me know and I will email you and try to help offline.  

http://www.dustie.com/quit/stars.htm

Hey, my daughter is a special ed teacher too and you guys are amazing.

Hi Denim,

I have had that happened many times after typing a long post and then puff it's gone-ugh!

Don't beat yourself up over that 'just one'.  I quit in 2010 and the 'just one' got me in 2012 and back to full time smoking in less then one month.  it took me 3 years to try again.  We now know that there is no such thing as one cigarette.

It's very hard on the 'grumpy and short'.  i was a 'mean girl' for several months ha,ha!  There is only so much we can do about that but apologize when you realize it then 'let it go'.  Quitting smoking is a hard and lonely journey even with all the support you can get so give yourself a break.

You may see me repeat some articles for reading.  It is because we often need to reread the same things we read when we first quit because now you are  in the 'nitty gritty' of it all.

   Read the 14 mind tricks to help with Junkie Thinking:                    

Verywell Mind

Use These Tips to Beat the Mind Games When You Quit Smoking

Ex-smoker Beth offers practical tips and examples of how you can turn smoking urges into benign thoughts that won't put your quit program at risk.

Read more from Verywell Mind

Hey Cindi, 

     As you can see from the replies, you didn’t scare anyone off. I’m just sorry that you were having such a difficult time and none of us were here to answer back. Though, I’m glad Marge was able to step in and respond. She’s a great support. I’m happy to hear your feeling better now and made it through without smoking. We all know how much willpower that takes and what a struggle it can be. You should be so proud of yourself. I agree it would be great if chocolate or ice cream could give us that feeling, but it doesn’t, I tried it. I think it might add a inch to my waist line if I keep eating it though, lol. Actually, eating meals is one of the things that I struggle with, not because I eat too much or not enough, but because I was used to having a cigarette after eating a meal. Now it’s not there. Like they say here, I’m having to learn to do things without them that I used to do with them. We all are and it’s not a easy thing. Worth it yes, but easy no, not for any of us. I’m glad posting helped you. We’re all here with you and for you, albeit a little late this time, but hopefully that’s a rare instance. I think someone is usually able to respond most of the time. Please keep hanging in and know that you can do it. We’re all here cheering you on and wishing you all the best. I have to go for now. I’ll try to post some more later.