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Alexandra's Quit Story   Quit Stories and Journals

Started 9/23/15 by alEXsmoker (afrancis333); 45637 views.
Alex (alexsmoker3)

From: Alex (alexsmoker3)

9/17/19

Meredith,

Thank you so much for sharing that. I’m not alone - yay!  Yeah,  I read in my journal  this morning that there are some things that make me feel like a real monster. And then they suggested to pat my little monster on the head LOL. I like the way that you put it about giving your depression monster a hug. I had some good self talk yesterday -  telling the young version of Alex that she’s OK and she is loved and she is perfect just the way she is and I will take good care of her from now on. It was very cathartic to say the least.  Off to yoga now!  xoxo

alreadysick

From: alreadysick

9/17/19

Can I adopt you as a twin to my 37 y.o. daughter? She would love you and have a blast with you! LOL

Msg 469.263 deleted
Alex (alexsmoker3)

From: Alex (alexsmoker3)

9/17/19

LOL - yes definitely! blush  Yay!  Mama Michele heart_eyes_cat

In reply toRe: msg 265
Brenda (1sept19)

From: Brenda (1sept19)

9/17/19

Hello Ladies,

   Some days I am a slug, some days I am the energizer rabbit, some days I am Sybil, others the monster from the Black Logoon. What is happening to my brain ?  Then other days I feel at peace, which is lovely.  Hoping for more and more peace filled days.  Proud of us all, ladies. 

Brenda (1sept19)

From: Brenda (1sept19)

9/17/19

I guess i am showing my age, Sybil was a movie starring Sally Field. She had a whole truck load of different personalities, you never knew who she was going to be.  Some days I can go from sweet and pleasant to a raving lunatic in about 3 seconds flat.  So, Sybil...

Meredith (GettinFree)

From: Meredith (GettinFree)

9/17/19

Sweet. I'm a little pop-culture impaired, too, soyaknow.... ;D

In reply toRe: msg 269
alexisfree

From: alexisfree

9/20/19

I'm beginning to learn more and more about myself.  First, I'm extremely selfish.  Like, if someone does something I don't like, I want to make sure they are punished.  I need to work on forgiveness - God help me!  I used to smoke about these situations, but now I don't - and I don't want to.  So, there's that.  Secondly, if I can't make sure someone is punished for not meeting my expectations, then I go into self pity.  Therefore, I've concluded that I need help with being more selfless - God, help me.  Okay, that's it.  Nothing profound, just wanted to write that out.  

On a more positive note, I did a free style session in my car this morning on the way to work - it was AMAZING.  It was just me and God and I was letting the words flow - it sounded like a poetic praise session - so cool.  Great way to start my day.  I look forward to more smoke free days - just one day at a time! 

I also find it interesting how, since the rawness of the new quit has worn off, my mind is different.  It's weird.  Like, it isn't so intense or so pressing right now as it was 3 weeks ago.  It's kinda scary in a way.  I don't want to fall into the trap of, "Oh, I got this!" b/c I know that is dangerous thinking and I definitely don't want to lose my quit.  Maybe I'll read some of those articles the mods were talking about....smirk  

  • Edited September 20, 2019 8:25 am  by  alexisfree
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