About Smoking Cessation Forum

Hosted by Terry (abquitsmking)

Formerly known as the About.com Smoking Cessation support forum, this community is open to all who are recovering from nicotine addiction.

  • 5137
    MEMBERS
  • 274638
    MESSAGES
  • 9
    POSTS TODAY

Discussions

February 2021 Ex-Smokers - Start Here!   Quit Buddies Unite

Started 1/31/21 by Terry (abquitsmking); 33496 views.
Jatchat

From: Jatchat

Mar-4

Hi Nope62,

Thanks for the support, I wish you well also

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

Mar-4

Dear Sue, it's wonderful to hear from you - you were instrumental in my most successful quit to date -  and you're completely right, I AM a silly little madam!  Even sillier, because I HAVEN'T stopped today as planned - I got offered more work and most of the other actors smoke, so my junkie brain told me that today just wasn't the right day...   It was also that I couldn't reply to you or Anthony last night, which felt awful - I could read messages but not reply (the internet was on go-slow as Mike was uploading a massive video file), so - junkie brain again - I felt as if the fates were conspiring against me.

It's wonderful to be back here, but I do feel like a bit of a dick all the same. I LOVED not smoking, and the effect on my confidence with not hiding away, not feeling ashamed etc, was absolutely huge. I want to get it back, I really do, and I am so sorry - to everyone who has encouraged me on here, but also for myself - that I haven't managed it today.  Thanks for thinking of me as a survivor - it really helps, and I do believe I will crack it. I've been doing roleplay with medical students today (online) and had to play a cancer patient - it really brought it home to me.

I'm so glad you've got your 5 year wings - that's really wonderful - and that you're still friends with Marge, Anita and Triff (and your husband!).  I hope Spain is good too?  I'm assuming you're still there - I would be too if I could!  Covid is horrible wherever you are, but I can't help thinking that sunshine and a more laid-back lifestyle makes it less so.

Where to from here?   Well, I think it's pretty clear that I didn't have my head in quite the right place for today, and we have our 'bubble' friend - who smokes - coming over on Sunday, so I am now thinking Monday 8th, to give myself time to read all the articles and actually get to a point (intellectually at least) where I can be really committed to quitting.  I'm hoping this isn't just more junkie thinking.  I don't think it is - it feels like just getting properly prepared - but Mike is rolling his eyes a bit, and maybe you are too?

Really, really lovely to hear from you.  Thank you, Sue.

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

Mar-4

Hi Anthony, and thank you for the encouragement.  I'm sorry to say that I didn't manage to quit today, but I WILL.  I'm coughing and wheezing - not to mention very embarrassed that I'm doing such a stupid thing AGAIN - and I really have had enough of it. 

You're right, I do need to re-read the articles on here, and get my head in the right place.  I've now put my date forward to Monday 8th (partly because we've got a smoking friend coming over on Sunday but also to give me time to really nail why I want to be smoke-free).  I'm so tired of faffing about with this, and want this quit to be the last.  

I really hope your op goes well, and well done on your quit so far.  

Suzy

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

Mar-4

Hi Katie, and thank you so much for the encouragement - also, congratulations on four years.  When you get a minute, please tell me how nice that feels?  In the meantime, I do know you're right - smoking IS a mug's game.  The problem is that, while my rational brain knows and understands this, my junkie brain is busy saying 'feed me'.

So I haven't managed to quit today as I'd planned.  I am really disappointed about that, but in all honesty I don't think I was very well prepared for it.   I'm now giving myself a few more days to read and think and visualise, and will be stubbing out my last cigarette Sunday night.   I've had many attempts (and two year-long quits) and I really LIKE being a non-smoker!  It's just the crappy bit in between that's the problem...

It's lovely to hear from someone in the UK.  Whereabouts are you?  I'm in Devon.

Thanks again, Katie.  And I will be back, fighting fit, on Monday.

Suzy

Loreficent

From: Loreficent

Mar-4

Don’t beat yourself up. You will find that space you had before. Yes, read, re- educate, stick with it. It eventually comes down to accepting you will either smoke forever or not. You’ve done it before and will be back on that horse soon. Believe in yourself. Hang onto how you did it before, set your mind, and promise yourself this time you will go one day longer. It’s not silly to prepare and set yourself up for things for the first few days. It’s a fine line between that and rationalization too though. But set your sights on Monday and take the next few days to prepare. We will be here for you then!blush

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

Mar-4

Thank you!  That is so helpful to me right now - exactly the right words at exactly the right time.   Are you Lori, or are you magnificent?  Perhaps you're both!

I will spend the next few days wisely, don't worry (well, apart from smoking, which is almost more stupid than I can bear).  What I mean is that I'm going to read loads on here, and re-visualize how great I felt when I didn't smoke.  I do know that it's wonderful, life-affirming, confidence-building and so much more even than that.  I am scared - well, my junkie-brain is - but I'm also excited.

Thanks again.

Suzy  

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

Mar-4

Dear Butirflis,

Well, I screwed up again today, but I will be back - on Monday.  I remember you so fondly, and I'm so glad that you have nearly seven weeks under your belt.  Maybe we should dust off those old charm bracelets - they were an inspired idea - or perhaps even get new ones?   I hope things are good in your life, and thank you - so much - for getting in touch.  It means a lot.  

Suzy x

Loreficent

From: Loreficent

Mar-4

Oh, good! I’m glad it is helpful. Really though, I think the beating yourself up is the junkie thinking at it’s best. It tells you all the things the addict piece wants you to believe. How you failed, how you can’t , how you’re not ready, how hard it is, how miserable you’ll be, and on and on. Well...you just can’t keep listening to all of that! Of course you know how terrible you feel about giving up a long quit. But you also know you did it before! Don’t stay in that junkie trap too long. The addict loves to live in the shadows. Set your sights on Monday. 
Ahhh...my most confusing user name. Lore is fine, a shortened version of my given name, Lori is fine too, my now legal name. Since you are an Actor though, surely you’ve seen “Maleficent”? My nickname is a combination of Lore and that. There are those in my life that see me as an advocate for all creatures and as formidable to some things; at the time the nickname was given (by my stepson) it was formidable to who is now my Ex and any who would bring strife to other creatures in my presence. But...being a formidable fairy will have to wait until the life after my next life, in which I plan to be a six foot redheaded Mermaid. Lol! joy Stay close to here on Monday and we will have us some fun!

Suzy2018

From: Suzy2018

Mar-4

I think you're a very formidable fairy indeed!  How do you know so much about me and my junkie???  Thanks again, and see you next week.

And I'm sorry for the brief reply - dinner calls (it's saying "I'm burning" unfortunately), and I also have to remember to invoice for today - love the work, rubbish at admin.

Suzy

Loreficent

From: Loreficent

Mar-4

Because maybe all of our inner junkies really aren’t that different?? I know my addict very well. Lol. I think I read your story earlier though. My heart went out to you. I know what it’s like to have stopped for some time and go back. It feels terrible. 
But....we are not dead yet! Never too late to stop I think.

Enjoy your dinner! blush 

TOP