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Desperate to Smoke, Desperate to Quit   Introductions/Newcomers Nook

Started 1/9/23 by Terry (abquitsmking); 4249 views.

From: Jerthie123


Thanks Anne. I'm happy to give any type of support I can, especially while my struggle is ongoing. I have had 17 lozenges today. I feel hopeless, but I too know that if I'm still here on this forum, I do have even just a thread of hope to cut back again.


From: Molly010


Hi Karen,

Coming to this forum and asking for help is a good step.  One mantra I have seen on this forum several times is to never quit quitting.  When you are dealing with stress, it makes it much more difficult to be in the right mindset.  For many of us, smoking was our "friend."  The thing we could turn to when things were bad for comfort.  Getting out of that mindset is really difficult no matter what is happening.  Learning how to cope with difficult situations without smoking is something all of us had to relearn.  

There are groups such as smoking anonymous, etc. that may also be helpful.  If you are dealing with an alcoholic spouse, you may also want to look into Alanon meetings.  I am not a counselor, but starting there may give you some tools to put you in a better mindset.  Quitting smoking is a journey of learning about ourselves and how we overcome addiction.  Everyone's journey is different and has its own battles.  We just have to keep fighting!  

kstm (KarenEStMary)

From: kstm (KarenEStMary)


Thank you.

5 days now. Since I fell off course about a month ago after almost 2 months of stopping, I know what my journey ahead holds. The thoughts to go for a smoke are fleeting and usually diminish after deep breathing and exhaling and taking a short pause with my eyes closed reminding myself that I don't smoke anymore. I've had to quit beating myself up about this last stumble.....I ignored the NOPE rule. This time been hit with non stop headaches unlike last quit. I just need time. Thanks for reaching out


From: Anne2020


You are absolutely correct - you just need time and you will twice as strong as before.  Keep doing what you are doing and you will win as long as you do.

Congratulations for getting back into your non-smoking lifestyle.  Quitting smoking really is one of the best things you could ever do for yourself.



From: Jerthie123


I want to chime in here. Karen, don't fret too much, although that is easier said than done. Five days of not smoking is a small but stable start. Keep closing your eyes and keep taking deep breaths, reminding yourself that you no longer smoke. Take all of that pride and peace into the next moment, and let those moments continue to roll into quitting success. Stay busy. Chew gum. Sip cold water. Go for walks. Light housework. Music. Word searches, crosswords, praying... There is lots to keep us occupied. You have got this. I believe in you!

Mercy (mercy164)

From: Mercy (mercy164)


Hi Molly,

  I did need to read what you wrote. I did a lot of hiding from my 26 year-old daughter. She would really let me have it, so I just snuck around. My mother died at 59 from cigs and I have just heard my father has lung cancer, although he quit 20 years ago. I am afraid and on the other hand at 9 days quit I am dying for a cigarette. I hate that. My father is a big screaming red flag and I am pushing it away because I want to pretend everything is okay still. Still. Jeez. Sick of this addiction!


9 days


From: JavaNY


Hi Mercy,

You are on the road to get rid of this addiction. You just need to stay strong. The first month or so is the hardest part, but you don't want to lose the 9 days you have.  When a crave comes, be prepared for it. 




From: Jerthie123


Hey Mercy, hey quit smoking family... I think that pretty soon I will really cut down back to 6 lozenges a day instead of 12-18. Susan, I don't know what is holding me back. I think there is a still, small voice in my head that wants to do this cold turkey and NOPE along with the family. Only my mantra would be NOSE... Not one suck ever, lol. At least I can laugh a bit. I think I can do it, at the very least cut down. I have had so far, 15 lozenges today. I feel bad about myself, but I am going through a lot of changes in my life and my lifestyle. I have been in an off and on relationship for the past six years. I need to make a decision about whether or not I want to stay in it or leave. This is my life. But it is also the life of someone I dearly love! The problem is... Too much and too complicated to explain. I am a complicated person. I know that I'm a nice person, I have that going for me. I have a full time job that I like. I live with elderly parents which I complain about only occasionally and they are healthy. I think to complete my life is to quit using nicotine. I have two and a half more sleeves of lozenges. Maybe I will let go after I finish them. Sometimes I have a dream and a goal that I will always use them but only 2 a day... One with my morning coffee and one before I sleep. Maybe I will start this as soon as tomorrow. Susan, I think I can find a new taste and you have a solid mantra in... Try hard enough. The more I slip into 18 lozenges a day, the more I admit that I am not trying hard enough, and am becoming lazy and complacent. Everyone here is so kind! I have been singing the same old tune of saying I want to cut down or quit, and not one soul has judged me or discouraged me. People here feed me love and hope... Wisdom and light! I maybe have to post more. I found right at this moment that when I re-read this thread, in entirety, it made me want to really try harder. Maybe tomorrow will be the day I segue into a non-nicotine lifestyle. What lies on the other side of that new lifestyle? I will end my post here. Thank you family!

Mercy (mercy164)

From: Mercy (mercy164)


Thanks, Paul. Glad to meet you.


10 days


From: xvaper



You can overcome this addiction by deciding not to smoke minute by minute, hour to hour, day to day. If you stick with it, eventually your addiction will become dormant and  you will be free of the desire to smoke. ( you may have fleeting moments but they will last a second)

You have two options. One is to dope yourself with nicotine which does nothing for you, through a cigarette, which you pay a fortune for, they profits of which are split between the tobacco companies and Uncle Sam. Basically, you are paying them to kill yourself.

The other option you have is that every day you don't smoke significantly slashes your odds of getting or dying from a smoke related disease. Every day you don't smoke significantly slashes the odds that your daughter will have to watch you suffer and lose her mom prematurely. 

This is a disease, but there is a cure. Just say nope every moment. keep reading and watching anything that explains addiction and how to overcome it. For me that was probably what kept me going the first year or so. Retrained my brain to understand and internalize that what my brain told me I wanted, was only a reaction to chemical dependency and not really what I want or need. I replaced a lifetime of Propaganda with educating myself about the facts of nicotine addiction, and it worked.

I've been clean 2 years.